- A hilarious version of the pronoun conversation which took a detour through Second Life.
- Waking up at 6am with the thought "You know what? This is a great
time for an oil change."
- Getting to work before all the parking disappears, even with the oil change.
- "I always thought you were a sick person, but now I know you definitely are!" -- Purple, upon hearing the 6am bit.
- The many ways in which the concept that the oil light is an emergency situation got reinforced to Figment at the start of that ill-fated date: my vehement lecture, the concurrent clunking noise from his engine, the subsequent hike and tow truck odyssey, and then the engine
- Categorizing typos, written and otherwise.
- Being exactly as helpful as a ferret in a bowl of packing peanuts.
- Accidentally magnetizing the whole silverware drawer.
- Iron Man magnetic bondage. (Does anyone have any fic recs?)
- Being as safe bored as a ferret would be.
- A half-hour meeting that turned into an hour and a half.
- The epic wankfest involving "fruit lawyers" on [off-topic]. (Including, of course, Mr. With All Due Respect Bite Me, who is the continual embodiment of the failure mode of clever.)
- Not being allowed to interpret "having an awesome time at the casino-themed party" to include "I hide in the corner and play Monopoly". (Note: a 90 person party after a 90 person day of professional conference wrangling is likely to have launched some claustrophobia and/or agoraphobia in addition to the usual introvert hell. Hiding in the corner and playing Monopoly is the "look friend, I'm being social" interpretation; the non-social interpretation has me either crying in a bathroom or fleeing to another building to either cry or not-cry in someone's office, probably Purple's. I will have to have a chat with Madam Standards about introversion, and the way where I am in fact awfully bubbly and social for an introvert, which is because I don't have terrifying levels of social anxiety or particular shyness anymore, but push me too far past my threshold and I will start feeling, and then showing, the effects, and no one wants me having a visible meltdown at the social event -- least of all me.)
- Interpreting "vaginal mesh" to be not the medical product, but a type of network, and speculating that when one node menstruates, adjacent nodes will start as well.
- Adding a guy whose name essentially became a verb to my (small, local) jargon list, neutrally phrasing it as "left quite the legacy" or some such.
- Duck-spotting. (No visible ducklings.)
- A conversation with a different person than whom I first linked the jargon update to, about the guy whose name became a verb, which grew to encompass several instances of That Guy (in these cases, gender-specific guy) Whose Code Always Does That Thing. A certain B.F. was on that list... (it's that other 10%, i swear to fucking enki...)
- Air currents that conspired to blow soap bubbles into Purple's eyes.
- The two (more or less, situationally) single people looking at each other and high-fiving over the song that was written for the girl with the dreadful boyfriend, with the idea that being single was much better than being in a relationship like that. SOLIDARITY, YO. (Is
anyone enough of a Colbie Caillat fan to identify this song?)
- Duck-spotting, and subsequent discussion of whether or not relatively small non-snapping turtles which also frequent the duck pond are capable of hunting, and many gruesome descriptions of predator-related duckling death.
- A brief and hilarious story involving the phrase "that giant black dildo named Excalibur which you keep under your bed" (not my bed, but that's a great name for one of those).
- Explaining the "Prince's Wand"
- Telling Purple that he was the best Purple and the second-best $NAME. (I held out...most of the week!)
- Condensing a wall of text into a much smaller wall of text.
- Sharing my really sharp-looking briefing document with Purple and having him appreciate it.
- Sharing my really sharp-looking briefing document with Purple and having him critique the layout from his various years of tasks involving desktop publishing. (I like this dude. I really like this dude. In the fullness of time I expect that his career or mine, or the whims of our departments, will take us off the same floor. At that point I intend to keep him in a way similar to how I decided I was keeping Darkside, but with less angst and also less raging unrequited love.)
- Setting up DEADLINE ready for the morning
- Undoing my hair
- The shower I'm about to take
- Tomorrow morning! 2nd Thursday!
And now, a gif of some ferrets bouncing around in a bowl of packing peanuts.