Evil Schemes with Neighbor

[azurelunatic]

Basically, I now have an outline of a plan to call Darkside's attention to the possibility that he might like me "like that."

It's been coming in the air for a while, but learning last night that Darkside is giving poor Neighbor -- well, it's not quite the "evil eye," but it's the Male Vibe that says "This guy is my competition, and I think my competition might be the better man... I don't have a chance" -- well.

Before, there was nothing I could do but wait for Darkside to pull his poor broken heart back together. Now, at least I can apply some crowbar force to his head, which may or may not be lodged securely up his ass.

The cunning plan:

Continue to come to breakfast especially for the purpose of seeing Darkside. Pay attention to him there. Perhaps back off just a touch in the flirting department with him, seeing as it's gotten to the point where we brush hands casually and he no longer flinches back when our hands touch over the RPG he's showing me. Pay attention to him in the computer lab, as usual.

...But when he's busy in the computer lab, and looks like he doesn't want to be disturbed, or between classes when I normally seek him out, I should be friendly and have a chat with Neighbor.

He doesn't get 100% of my attention anymore. It's pissing him off a little bit, but honestly, he needs to learn to deal with it... I have friends. But he doesn't get pissed off when I talk to friends, or talk online to friends. He only gets pissed off when I talk with people I might want to date, or who might want to date me.

In that case, my dear friend from the other side of the moon, it's very much time to get your act together and your ass in gear and make a move on me . . . before it's too late.

I love you dearly, old friend, but ... sometimes it's time to give up and move on.

I can't wait forever.

(I am yours.)

Comments

Shy guys

[lunna88.livejournal.com]

Maybe he is waiting for you to make a move on him?
If his self-image is low he may feel like he has no chance with you and therefore does not want to embarrass himself by making a move toward something more than the playful flirting. He is probably afraid of that kind of embarrassment ruining your close friendship. Don't push him away, pull him in!

[todfox.livejournal.com]

I worry that this could backfire -- if Darkside already thinks he's in competition, it seems silly to manipulate his feelings into jealousy.

I think you should be open with him. Ask him on a date, make a move on him.

[azurelunatic]

Thing is, I don't think he *knows* it. This is not a man very well in touch with what the under-part of his brain is thinking.

There is absolutely nothing going on between me and Neighbor. There was the possibility for it, on my side, but Neighbor's not interested.

Yes, I want to play with Darkside's head, provoke him into noticing that he's jealous.

*Noticing* is the key word here.

If this were solely for the pleasure of seeing Darkside jealous, I'd be content with what I was laughing my ass off about the night before last, namely that Darkside was giving Neighbor these *looks*.

Thing is, he played with fire, he burned his fingers, and now he's staying the hell away from matches. If all indications are correct, he's got some sort of feelings for me.

I can't ask him on a date until he's already realized "I like her." I've done it before, and each and every time he's weaseled out of it. "Sure, I'll go to the movies with you sometime." Each time I bring it up, though, he has some reason for not doing it.

If it's all my imagination and Neighbor's imagination, then what happens when I hang around with Neighbor a little more than usual? Darkside encourages me to get up the guts to ask Neighbor out; Darkside gains a new friend. Neighbor and Darkside would get along just fine if they ever sat down to talk to each other. Neighbor thinks that Darkside would be fun to hang out with. Darkside is always glad to meet someone new to talk anime and RPG's with.

I know where I'm going with this one.

I had a four-year "just friends" relationship with a certain young man, who cared a lot about me but didn't allow himself to see it or accept it, because he was dangerous and poisoned everything he touched.

In that relationship, I bent over backwards for him, and he did nothing to keep the relationship afloat on his end.

That one ended in complete disaster.

If I don't do something to make sure Darkside keeps his side afloat, we're both going to go down fast.

I'm not proposing that I suddenly light out after Neighbor chasing him. I just intend to keep right on what I've been doing:

Eat breakfast with Darkside
Go to the computer lab
When Darkside is busy with projects for class and what I've got to do on the computer is done, I will go over and chat, at a companionable distance, with Neighbor.
Say hello to Darkside between classes sometimes
Say hello to Neighbor between classes
Give Darkside my full attention when Darkside comes in search of *me* rather than the other way around.

Darkside is one of those people who doesn't call. He's one of those people who will do his own thing if his friends just up and go somewhere without telling him first. He won't seek you out if you ditch him.

I don't propose to ditch him. I propose to lure him into finding out exactly what's going on between me and Neighbor.

Breakfasts are still Darkside's, utterly and absolutely, even if I have to fall asleep during class to make sure that's so. When Darkside's got my attention, he will have it. I'm just going to start making him earn it.

He's stopped mourning the lost relationship in his heart. I can see it in his eyes.

Now I just have to get it through his head.

[azurelunatic]

Joanie, you idiot. You should have stuck tight with him and stayed. And stayed.