azurelunatic | Parent-proofing the house

Parent-proofing the house

What I need to do:

First, hide the beer. Second, display the condoms prominently in my bathroom. No need for my mother to worry that I'm not being careful. Third, hide the sex toys. I haven't gotten any new ones since I lived with them, but my parents really don't need to see them.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

hide the beer?

Just because I'm a college student living with two more, that doesn't mean my parents need to know this... and besides, we've got an image to maintain. Five year olds do not need to know how to open beer bottles.

oh....so I SHOULDN'T be training the cats to fetch the beer?

Nope.

Not here, anyway.

If you want your own cats to know how to, that's your business...

Hell, hon, if you hide the beer, they'll just wonder what you're drinking/doing, and if it's harder than beer. ^_^ Now, the sex toys, yes, I would put those away in a drawer. This isn't hiding, this is tidying up; it's where they belong when not in use. Other than that, I don't hide SHIT from my parents. (Mind, my parents-in-law are a different matter entirely; my mother is quite used to the fact that two of her daughters are thoroughly bisexual and polyamorous, and she's known for a loooooooong time that we all have filthy minds. Hell, she tells dirty jokes with the best of us. :)

Beer would unnecessarily grouch my dad; he trained me to have more class than that. I think that the bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream in the fridge will do well to assure them that I am indeed a normal college student... especially as I don't drink the beer in the first place, it's mostly (all three bottles a month) Votania's.

The most-often-used sex toys, when not in actual use, reside in the one and only bathroom drawer. Sex toy storage, on the other hand, where they go when they're actually put away, would be a plastic box dedicated to the purpose, which is stashable far far back at the back of the lowest bathroom cupboard shelf. In other words, Votania and all the usual house guests & residents know that this drawer is not where the spare hand towels and washcloths are stored, and in fact if they open it, they will see things that they do not want to see. Everybody else ... doesn't. Especially as traditional family protocol dictates that this drawer position is designated for towels/washcloths...

No need to traumatize them, in other words. ;)

...My mother's the conservative one. My dad's family, pretty much anything goes. My mother ... yeeks. She's wonderful and I love her, but I don't wish to cause her unnecessary worry/discomfort... and setting up a situation where she might be opening up a drawer expecting washcloths and instead running into a bright orange jelly dildo is unnecessary... though I must admit I would enjoy the look on my father's face. He'd then probably ask if Adam was doing his job properly, or if in fact the said item belonged to Adam.

See, my family wouldn't be traumatized. Quite the contrary, they'd probably tease me about my choices. ^_^

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Parent-proofing the house

no subject

Yep, hide the beer.

Re: Yep, hide the beer.

Re: Yep, hide the beer.

no subject

Beer vs. father; proper putting-away

no subject

Re: Beer vs. father; proper putting-away