Azure Jane Lunatic (Azz) 🌺 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
azurelunatic) wrote2001-05-04 07:13 pm
azurelunatic) wrote2001-05-04 07:13 pm
Entry tags:
chaos.
My HP doesn't really dig why I consider chaos to be such a large part of my life. One of my specialties is imposing order upon disorder, and finding patterns in nonorder.
Guess I can't really explain it here either. Chaos makes such pretty pictures, though, and I'm so much of a drama queen that I have to like chaos, 'cause you wouldn't have any drama worth speaking of without chaos.
One of my old friends from high school told me that my worst problem was trying to find the pattern, the plot, to my life. He said that it's just a great big jumble of fairly random events, and to try to fit them into a neat plot like a book is a way that madness lurks. He'd had that difficulty too.
Still, I search through my life for evidences of past lives, predestination, possible plotlines and congruences with my past. In one reality, I'm already married to Godai and we have seven kids. One single birth and two sets of triplets.
Again with the resonances. I know I'm jumping at the drop of a pin, but when he said that to me, I started giggling 'cause of the guy (also named David, for some odd reason) who I was going to marry once upon a time, and have triplets with. At that exact moment, David who I was once planning to marry said hello via AIM...
Synchronicity's a witch.
...and as I say that, the back falls off of my chair. Signs and portents all over the frickin' place. And I reach out and grasp the candle rather than my plastic cup of Mountain Dew, just because it's closer, and contemplate taking a drink until I realize that not only is it pink, unlike Mountain Dew, it's also on fire.
Guess I can't really explain it here either. Chaos makes such pretty pictures, though, and I'm so much of a drama queen that I have to like chaos, 'cause you wouldn't have any drama worth speaking of without chaos.
One of my old friends from high school told me that my worst problem was trying to find the pattern, the plot, to my life. He said that it's just a great big jumble of fairly random events, and to try to fit them into a neat plot like a book is a way that madness lurks. He'd had that difficulty too.
Still, I search through my life for evidences of past lives, predestination, possible plotlines and congruences with my past. In one reality, I'm already married to Godai and we have seven kids. One single birth and two sets of triplets.
Again with the resonances. I know I'm jumping at the drop of a pin, but when he said that to me, I started giggling 'cause of the guy (also named David, for some odd reason) who I was going to marry once upon a time, and have triplets with. At that exact moment, David who I was once planning to marry said hello via AIM...
Synchronicity's a witch.
...and as I say that, the back falls off of my chair. Signs and portents all over the frickin' place. And I reach out and grasp the candle rather than my plastic cup of Mountain Dew, just because it's closer, and contemplate taking a drink until I realize that not only is it pink, unlike Mountain Dew, it's also on fire.