azurelunatic | No labrador retrievers are to pee on this bicycle.

Hah! Yeah, it always annoys me when labs pee on my bike.

And also, no one shall smoke the bike.

I hear bongs made from bikes are serious bad luck.

A big problem in the land of sled dogs.

(Actually, now I am trying to imagine a sled dog team made of labs, and boggling at the likely chaos.)

It would be comedy gold, though.

Depends on the type - yellow would certainly be; otherwise I think black comedy? ;)

Touché.