Azure Jane Lunatic (Azz) 🌺 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
azurelunatic) wrote2016-09-28 12:02 am
azurelunatic) wrote2016-09-28 12:02 am
Entry tags:
Sorry I cannot hear you I'm kind of busy.
So my healthcare provider attempts to provide world-class service. They try.
... They are trying, yes.
Now, I'm one of those people whose ability to take incoming calls from unknown/untrusted parties is significantly variable, but never great. I'm generally completely unable to take calls before I've properly awakened. If something needs to be communicated with complete clarity and without error, telephone is the worst way to do it. Text is far preferable. That's without even counting in the PTSD... (two terrible phone jobs and one ex-friend having an extended breakdown culminating in serious self-harm. do not recommend.) My sleep schedule is terrible, and there's no guarantee that I'll be coherent before noon, even if I'm awake, without a different medication setup than the one I'm currently on.
They have a website where you can ostensibly manage various parts of the information that is distributed to all of the departments which interact with you. You would think that you'd be able to update your name, honorific, and telephone preferences there...
... and you would think wrong.
99% of the departments who interact with me start their relationship by ignoring the note that says NEVER CALL THIS PATIENT, and ignoring the note that says THIS PATIENT'S NAME IS [INITIALS], and calling me at 9am or shortly thereafter, with a cheerful "Hi [wallet first name, mispronounced]!"
So I put in a request that maybe there should be some place on their fucking website where I could manage preferences for things like DON'T FUCKING CALL ME, EVER.
At 4:50 pm on Monday, more or less, my phone rang. It was Member Services, who had some questions, like, who exactly was it who was calling me? EVERY DEPARTMENT EVER. But Member Services and Marketing didn't call me? MY DOCTORS, EVEN WITH THE BIG NOTE ABOUT NOT CALLING ME. EACH SEPARATE MEDICAL DEPARTMENT. But not Member Services? Because this got sent to Member Services. LOOK I WAS JUST TRYING TO SEND A SUGGESTION ABOUT HOW YOU COULD IMPROVE THINGS, WHY THE FUCK COULDN'T YOU EMAIL ME. But email's not secure? YOUR DOCTORS HAVE THIS NIFTY THING WHERE THEY EMAIL OUT A NOTICE AND I LOG IN TO THE WEBSITE AND READ THE MESSAGE. IT WORKS JUST FINE. Oh. We don't have that. WELL MAYBE THEY SHOULD GIVE IT TO YOU.
Apparently eventually I answered all the questions.
... Except then Tuesday, right while I was waiting for an optometrist, THE PHONE RINGS. IT'S THEM AGAIN. WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME; THIS IS IN FACT A BAD TIME; PLEASE EMAIL IT, WHATEVER IT IS.
... And naturally, dealing with the phone call then? Made me actually incapable of dealing sensibly with the optometrist. WHICH IS WHY YOU MOTHERFUCKERS NEED TO STOP FUCKING CALLING ME.
... seriously. When someone has submitted a grievance about PEOPLE CALLING WHEN THE NOTE SAYS NOT TO CALL, who the *fuck* thinks "Oh, I don't understand this ... I should call them to clarify!"????????
... They are trying, yes.
Now, I'm one of those people whose ability to take incoming calls from unknown/untrusted parties is significantly variable, but never great. I'm generally completely unable to take calls before I've properly awakened. If something needs to be communicated with complete clarity and without error, telephone is the worst way to do it. Text is far preferable. That's without even counting in the PTSD... (two terrible phone jobs and one ex-friend having an extended breakdown culminating in serious self-harm. do not recommend.) My sleep schedule is terrible, and there's no guarantee that I'll be coherent before noon, even if I'm awake, without a different medication setup than the one I'm currently on.
They have a website where you can ostensibly manage various parts of the information that is distributed to all of the departments which interact with you. You would think that you'd be able to update your name, honorific, and telephone preferences there...
... and you would think wrong.
99% of the departments who interact with me start their relationship by ignoring the note that says NEVER CALL THIS PATIENT, and ignoring the note that says THIS PATIENT'S NAME IS [INITIALS], and calling me at 9am or shortly thereafter, with a cheerful "Hi [wallet first name, mispronounced]!"
So I put in a request that maybe there should be some place on their fucking website where I could manage preferences for things like DON'T FUCKING CALL ME, EVER.
At 4:50 pm on Monday, more or less, my phone rang. It was Member Services, who had some questions, like, who exactly was it who was calling me? EVERY DEPARTMENT EVER. But Member Services and Marketing didn't call me? MY DOCTORS, EVEN WITH THE BIG NOTE ABOUT NOT CALLING ME. EACH SEPARATE MEDICAL DEPARTMENT. But not Member Services? Because this got sent to Member Services. LOOK I WAS JUST TRYING TO SEND A SUGGESTION ABOUT HOW YOU COULD IMPROVE THINGS, WHY THE FUCK COULDN'T YOU EMAIL ME. But email's not secure? YOUR DOCTORS HAVE THIS NIFTY THING WHERE THEY EMAIL OUT A NOTICE AND I LOG IN TO THE WEBSITE AND READ THE MESSAGE. IT WORKS JUST FINE. Oh. We don't have that. WELL MAYBE THEY SHOULD GIVE IT TO YOU.
Apparently eventually I answered all the questions.
... Except then Tuesday, right while I was waiting for an optometrist, THE PHONE RINGS. IT'S THEM AGAIN. WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME; THIS IS IN FACT A BAD TIME; PLEASE EMAIL IT, WHATEVER IT IS.
... And naturally, dealing with the phone call then? Made me actually incapable of dealing sensibly with the optometrist. WHICH IS WHY YOU MOTHERFUCKERS NEED TO STOP FUCKING CALLING ME.
... seriously. When someone has submitted a grievance about PEOPLE CALLING WHEN THE NOTE SAYS NOT TO CALL, who the *fuck* thinks "Oh, I don't understand this ... I should call them to clarify!"????????
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