azurelunatic | successes, however small

Today I did something right. Darkside and I were sparring as usual, and he was making deliberately irritating comments in order to get me to do things right. I did a few things at him, and at the end of the mini-spar, he said, "Nice knife-hand there." I'd apparently gotten through to him at least once with it. "Congratulations," he said, and reached out to shake my hand.

I was startled, but let him shake it. After that, I just stood there for a few minutes, shaking just a little.

"You really don't trust me, do you," Darkside said.

"Should I?" I asked.

"That's up to you," he said.

There was no answer I could make to tell him that the reason I was keeping so far away and standing so guardedly was not because I was afraid he would hurt me after he said he wouldn't, but because I might touch him after I'd said I'd try not to.

If I thought you'd welcome it, I'd be all over you in a second... as it is, I shall respect your wishes...