Busy buzzy bumblebee-head

[azurelunatic]

Once upon a time, I described for marxdarx what was going on inside my head at any given moment, and why I was frustrated when I couldn't keep up with others.

As I detailed each thing, his expression got more and more amazed. I'm running several background processes, usually, with my mind on something I've been working on for a while. Darkside takes up a huge background process, to maintain the link and his avatar. I think about school, about my current tasks. I have another large process devoted to the Little Fayoumis. If he says something, I hear it and I process it and I know what he's up to at almost every moment when he and I are both conscious and in sound and/or sight range. In addition to that, in a conversation, when I'm told an idea, my mind goes skimming through my library -- have I encountered any similar ideas before? How did they work? If they did not work, why? If they did work, why? Is the situation comparable? How do I think it would work? How would it succeed if it succeeded? What would happen if it failed? What would be the most likely modes of failure? How would those modes of failure change any situations?

He boggled at me for a bit, and told me that if he tried to run all those things at once, his brain would severely lag, lock up, and possibly crash.

It's still frustrating. I think that I ought to be able to think faster, do things faster, work faster...

Comments

[azurelunatic]

Spur to write this: http://www.livejournal.com/users/shadesong/979111.html#t10695591

[hai-kah-uhk.livejournal.com]

I do that too. My solution is to limit my exposure to external stimulus. Which isn't hard as a housewife.

(It was even easier when I was sharing my head with someone who could take over for me! Oh, I miss those days.)

[azurelunatic]

I could never agree to limit my exposure too horribly much.

The computer is a nice safe way of doing it, though.

I do retreat to my room when there are too many people around. I keep realizing that I'm more of an introvert than I thought I was.

[hai-kah-uhk.livejournal.com]

Still less of an introvert than me. :)

However, I have the advantage of not particularly wanting to be faster at anything, or more extroverted than I am. I fully appreciate that quality of mine and realize how valuable (and strange) it is.