That Idiot Shawn and the mac & cheese

[azurelunatic]

When I was in high school, I had a best friend: That Idiot Shawn.

One night, he called me up, past my bedtime, with an urgent question: "Joan! Do you have to grease the pan to boil water?"

"Nooooo, Shawn."

"But won't it stick to the sides?"

"Nooooooooooo, Shawn."

"But I don't want it to burn..."


At length, I got him convinced that one could generally not burn water. I went to bed, and thought that was the end of it. But that was not to be.


The next day at school, I heard that he'd had a macaroni-and-cheese disaster. The macaroni had stuck to the pan (of course), and also burned (of course). I asked if he'd bothered to stir it.

"You mean you need to stir it?"

He'd also put the entire packet of the cheesy stuff in there. Not the entire contents of the packet... the packet, unopened, paper and plastic and metal and all. "I thought it was something where it would dissolve!"


About a year later, I learned from our mutual English teacher that he hadn't even drained the macaroni...

Comments

[mojo-iv.livejournal.com]

Dear god, I've known how to make that stuff since I was 8...

--m4

[azurelunatic]

He was 15 or 16 at the time.

i had a friend

[azurell.livejournal.com]

and she was living with me for a bit (actually, her husband is my best friend, I don't like her) anyhow, one day she decided she was going to make some grilled cheese sandwhiches for the two of them, and some tomato soup. So to start the sandwhiches I watched her butter a piece of bread, she then tossed it into a frying pan that was on about medium....(mind you I was also cooking something entirely different at the time) she then sliced some rather large slices of colby jack, then after a couple of minutes, she flipped the piece of now soggy buttered bread inside the frying pan, and continued to stare at it until I gave up and made them dinner...again.

Re: i had a friend

[azurelunatic]

I've toasted bread in a frying pan before, but... erm... how did she propose to make that particular combination work?

Re: i had a friend

[azurell.livejournal.com]

I really, for the life of me...don't know

I've toasted bread in a pan before too, it's pretty good, but I've never made grilled cheese with two pieces of toasted bread..or in her case...one

[mnfiddledragon.livejournal.com]

*laugh* Marc's father actually did burn water once - while boiling water to make instant oatmeal on a camping trip.

[azurelunatic]

Oh, my.

[mnfiddledragon.livejournal.com]

*giggle* *nod*

My mother also set the stove on fire once by boiling eggs for Easter, I think...All I remember is being in the bathtub, and Mom or Dad came in and told me to get out, we had to get out of the house, and then I remember the firetrucks coming up and going in the house....

Thankfully it was *just* the stove...but still, it's amazing the damage you can do just by boiling water! :P

[kdorian.livejournal.com]

You cannot burn water.

However, once the water has all boiled away, you can burn the pan quite nicely. As I've demonstrated, several times. I have to stop wandering off to do something else while I cook.

[azurelunatic]

I suppose I need to write up the can of beans next...

[kdorian.livejournal.com]

O_O Oh dear. Didn't remove it from the can? Didn't OPEN the can?

[azurelunatic]

One would have thought that he'd have at least punched holes for the steam to escape...

[elynne.livejournal.com]

... you're kidding. No, no, you aren't; right. Story, please? :D

Shawn and the Can of Beans

[azurelunatic]

Sure. One Shawn and the Can of Beans served up hot and fresh...

[kdorian.livejournal.com]

*Winces* Can go boom?

[azurelunatic]

He never even saw it coming.

Or rememered it afterwards.

Macaroni

[woggie.livejournal.com]

I don't know what his problem was. The instructions are on the side of the box, if he'd just bothered to read them. That's how I learned to make macaroni. :)

[snowelf.livejournal.com]

*laughs* What a total doofus.

[azurelunatic]

That's the general consensus, yes.

His daughter's giving him exactly as much hell as he was...

[snowelf.livejournal.com]

*laughs* Wow. Quite amusing.