The past few days according to LJ (approximately)

[azurelunatic]

[Edited to add: The Alliance of Readers' Keyboards, Monitors, Housemates & Pets have advised that food and/or beverages be put to the side before reading.

Перевод на русский mcmartyn ]


Malicious Security Crackers: "We used to take an account and try out about 40,000 passwords on it in about 5 seconds to see if it would unlock. LJ doesn't let us do that anymore. Damn that LJ! We'll show them! Here, have a malicious script!"
Malicious script: *takes 5 most commonly used passwords, tries them on 40,000 different accounts*
4000 LJ accounts: *unlock*
Malicious Security Crackers: "Score!"
LJ Geeks: "O RLY."
LJ: *stops allowing even remotely easy passwords*
4000 LJ users: "Hey! That was a perfectly good password! Why'd you make me change it?"
LJ Support: *facepalm*

LJ Geeks: *write more code*
LJ Admin: "Release the code!" *pokes server*
LJ Server: *falls over* "Error 500! Ow!" *can't get up*
LJ Admin: *blush*
LJ Addicts: "OMG ERROR 500!!"
LJ Support: "We know."

Bantown Crackers: "Hey, cool security flaws in Javascript, IE, and Firefox!"
Security Flaws: "How are you gentlemen?!"
LJ: "What happen?"
Bantown Crackers: "All your base are belong to us."
LJ Admin: "Subdomains for everybody! Fuck off, craxx0rbitches."
Free Users: "Yaaaay!"
Paid Users: "...no fair. Like we ever use voice post."
Permanent Users: "STFU, n00bs."
LJ Admin: "What they said. Suck it. Security reasons. Plenty of other sites out there."
Early Adopters: "Where's the LOVE?"
brad: "STFU, n00bs."
_____xo_so_em0_x_xx_____: "MY UNDERSCORES! WTF!"
LJ Support: "You got a rename token, so suck it."
so__________gratuitous_x_x_x: "WTF? They got a free rename token and I didn't?"
LJ Support: "It's called restrictions on what subdomains can be named. Your username still works. Deal."
so__________gratuitous_x_x_x: "OMG THE HYPHENS!"
note_to_cat maintainer volunteering in Support: "Suck it."

Bantown Crackers: "We still got cookies, yo."
LJ Admins: "Oh no you don't."
All login cookies: *expire*
Bantown Crackers: "Well, fuck. Eh, more suckers to hack out there."
All previously logged-in users: "WTF? We're logged out!"
LJ Support: "Big frickin' deal. Log in again. Duh."

The half of LJ that wasn't paying attention: "...Dude. What did they do with the passwords and URLs and shit? How come I got logged out? Somebody? Anybody? Bueller?"
LJ Support: "OMG HEADACHE."

Comments

[redaxe.livejournal.com]

(here via friendsfriends page)

*ROFL and falls off the floor*

May I link this?

[azurelunatic]

Certainly!

(And. Goodness. All that yelling about hyphens.)

[conscience.livejournal.com]

*warning*
Do not read The Lunatic at 0630 with REALLY hot coffee in mouth.

[azurelunatic]

Never advised, that one.

Sticky stuff that's hard to get off the monitor isn't recommended either.

But sailorjim has more of a screenspew warning. Not on a regular basis, but when his life takes a turn for the surreal, he puts my poor efforts to shame.

[hummingwolf.livejournal.com]

Here via conscience. Good summary!

[azurelunatic]

Thanks.

I keep repeating "Nasal fixation. Nasal fixation!" to myself when I see trollage nowadays, but perhaps unfortunately that makes trolls seem more like two-year-olds in need of a nap.

[crystalrowan.livejournal.com]

Got here via conscience - mind if I link to this and friend you? That was priceless. :)

[azurelunatic]

Perfectly all right. :)

[newroticgirl.livejournal.com]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

conscience is pimping you hardcore... I'm here from her too. :)

[azurelunatic]

Thanks!

[mscongeniality.livejournal.com]

Here via redaxe and spreading the love.
Most excellent.

[azurelunatic]

Thanks. :)

[popfiend.livejournal.com]

Darn you. Darn you to heck.

I laughed my ass off. Now I have no ass.

My ass! My ass!

Do you know how hard it is to sit at a computer and read LJ without an ass?

[azurelunatic]

Assuredly difficult!

[selenite.livejournal.com]

Best explanation I've seen of what's going on. Thanks!

[azurelunatic]

You're welcome! It sort of needed explaining, and then the sense of humor/muse/hour of the night got away from me.

[bekijane.livejournal.com]

That needed a C&C warning. The cat is wearing my coffee, and the keyboard's part covered in egg roll.

Very very funny :-)

[azurelunatic]

Poor cat! Poor keyboard!

Speaking of which, how's the hardware/software/wetware situation progressing? Anything?

[gingicat]

Yeah, that pretty well covers it. :)

Personally, I think LJ should be like GMail, and expire cookies every two weeks anyway.

(Here via redaxe)

[azurelunatic]

I think it's, what, something like 65 days now? Ah. I was close. 60. That's rather a long time for a dormant session to lie slumbering like the Elder Gods beneath the waves.

[ex-kingdavey885.livejournal.com]

Here via bekithewitch

I didn't really know what was going on or care for that matter. Got locked out for a bit but sod it I'll come back later.

Your review is so funny. Love it thanks. Much better than looking for an offical answer.

[azurelunatic]

This is the sort of thing that the people giving the official answer would probably love to be allowed to officially answer. :-D

[kiwiria.livejournal.com]

Only too true.

I spent waaaaaay too much time on news yesterday, laughing at all the entitlement queens/kings over there.

[azurelunatic]

I saw you over there! And you were helping out, too. Admit it.

[elance.livejournal.com]

*metaquotes you*

[azurelunatic]

*grin* Thanks! ...Though I don't think it was strictly necessary, the way the link unexpectedly propagated. That was almost uncanny.

[hitchhiker.livejournal.com]

brilliant! (here via redaxe)

[azurelunatic]

Thanks! :)

[dar-jeeling.livejournal.com]

Here via metaquotes. Hilarious! Also, informative. But mostly hilarious. ;)

[azurelunatic]

Thanks!

[tx-cronopio.livejournal.com]

Oh, my. I found you off a flister. May I post a link to you on my flist? THIS WAS MAGNIFICENT!

[azurelunatic]

You certainly may! Thanks. :)

[taer-silveroak.livejournal.com]

hahaha, hilarious.

[azurelunatic]

Thanks. :)

PERFECT!!!

[happypete.livejournal.com]

That's just AWESOME!

Prepare for the equivalent of LJ /.-ing, though, because All Your Flist Are Belong To This Post....

Re: PERFECT!!!

[vvalkyri.livejournal.com]

:supposes she should wave a hand:
= Found you on metaquotes, then linked directly... suspect happypete may be via me :)

So. . . . what exactly makes the subdomains more secure? Is it a directory structure/permissions inheritance thing?

(I've had a paid account for years and have never bothered to tell people to do vvalkyri.livejournal.com. :shrug:)

[enchantedpagan.livejournal.com]

Heh, I stole this!
Too flippin funny!

[azurelunatic]

Glad you enjoyed it!

[joedecker.livejournal.com]

Here via geekchick, or mactavish, or metaquotes... ;)

[mactavish.livejournal.com]

You linked it before I did. :)

[sinemoria.livejournal.com]

That was fabulous. Pure poetry...

*giggles like a maniac*

Good thing i have no food or beverage...

[azurelunatic]

*grin* I suppose, in a heavily internet-pop-culture & profane way...

And thanks!

[amanda.livejournal.com]

Hahahahaha, OMG! This is just so funny! Here via bekkithewitch and linking to you in my journal too!

Hahahahahaha! *wipes tears*

Note to self: Breathe!

[azurelunatic]

Oxygen is an important thing, not just a passing fad! *grin*

[sinboy.livejournal.com]

Dear God I wish I could post something like this in the forums where I work. Sadly, we are not 133t like you folx, and ahve to maintain an... ahem... adult face, despite having zillions of n00b dorks as complaining customers.

[azurelunatic]

Alas for overprofessionalism! (Is that even a word? I hope not.)

Glad you enjoyed it.

[lostinlaura.livejournal.com]

any luck on the tires?

[azurelunatic]

? Was this to the right post?

[sarajayechan.livejournal.com]

*snerrrrrk*

I am so linking to this on my LJ.

[azurelunatic]

Glad you enjoyed it! :)