Whee emo whinery ahead.

[azurelunatic]

Having completely failed my "be a fucking grown-up" roll for Saturday, I'm going to bed.

Off to decent if late start -- dragged out late to do plasma, went to party after plasma. Party good. Party awesome, in fact. Bubble gun, pool, lots of people having fun -- it ruled. I was almost sorry to leave for RHPS, but azwriter at least would be devirginized, and I had made the commitment to be there.

I hadn't counted on freeway construction. I hadn't counted on leaving later than I'd planned to.

I didn't see any of the writers there when I got there. I waited around until time to let people in, looking. Then I got a refund for my ticket on the grounds that my party failed to show, and went back to the graduation party, where I'd been having fun.

Writers Group angst ensued. I said more things in chat than I'd really intended to, but I established to myself if no one else that I am just done. I love the people and the creative space we have created, but I cannot maintain the close bonding of the creative space with the all-inclusiveness that Fresh Start requires. It is not something that I can do. I can have one, but not the other. I want to keep the creative space we have created. (I don't know if I'd go back to a group that didn't have that. I don't think I could.) Fresh Start can't have as one of their groups a group that shuts people out. I can't run that group. It's not something I can do.

I can keep the group running for one, maybe two more weeks until we figure something out. I don't know if I'll be able to go back after that. I'm going to talk to Darkside sometime tomorrow, because he brings sanity.

---

Myrrh, e-mail (@yahoo or @lj) or call (602)xxx-xx42 tomorrow when you want to see about doing the IKEA thing. My text messages are down dead down nonfunctional fucked.

Comments

[smmc.livejournal.com]

Just an odd out of left field comment.

Is Mercury in retrograde or something? I had a pretty fucked up day and evening myself.

[azurelunatic]

Haven't the foggiest. So glad I got to see the blonder half this weekend.

What's the word on you vs. writers group tonight?

[smmc.livejournal.com]

Writers group is a go. I really shouldn't but I want to get the hell out of the house. Besides, I have very limited time left with you all!

The reasons for shouldn't include:
Hubby needs a nap. (pfft!)
Packing needs more doing
I'm pretty tired right now. But coffee can cure that.

[myrrhianna.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry. I should have got up and gone, but I wasn't even sure if it was this week or next week and there was no mention of it in anyone's journal and I was never around for any kind of meet-up information and my recollection of it was tangled up in a recital that I didn't have any info on either. Plus I've failed my existence roll for the past two days. I'm so sorry that everything fell apart.

[azurelunatic]

It'll all pull through.

Rocky Picture Show

[rhea-windrider.livejournal.com]

Joannie,

Clarification, we not going had nothing to do with things going on with Writer's. 1. Long way out for me 2. Not a lot of money this week
3. Insomnia issues on Friday. I was up for about 3 hours during the night. I was tired I just crashed. I apologize for not letting you know I wasn't coming.

Re: Rocky Picture Show

[azurelunatic]

I figured something of the sort. I also realized that if anyone had been trying to let me know that they couldn't come (or trying to find it on the road) they wouldn't have been able to reach me any time after 3:30, because I was out without a cellphone that anyone knew the number of. (I tried to put more minutes on my prepaid phone, but that didn't work so well.)