Azure Jane Lunatic (Azz) 🌺 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
azurelunatic) wrote2009-12-17 12:57 am
azurelunatic) wrote2009-12-17 12:57 am
Lovely place, but oh sweet Enki their website
So I met up with Chemla and we went to the Jewel Box Cafe for tea, in varying definitions of "tea". The cafe is lovely, and I recommend it without hesitation (at least from the small experience I had visiting it).
However. Chemla grabbed me their business card, and from their business card I got their website. Here it is: http://www.jewelboxcafe.net/home_jewelbox.html
Wall of shame: this is a bad website. It is very pretty. It has pictures of the location, and it says "Menu" and such, and it has the location's address and contact information.
One big problem: the "links" are not clickable, and, in fact, the whole page is just one big image.
1) where are those links?
2) what about my aging eyes and my ability to copy/paste that shit?
3) lolno.
Behold the current source code:
[Update: I called the cafe and all is good: http://azurelunatic.livejournal.com/6445043.html ]
However. Chemla grabbed me their business card, and from their business card I got their website. Here it is: http://www.jewelboxcafe.net/home_jewelbox.html
Wall of shame: this is a bad website. It is very pretty. It has pictures of the location, and it says "Menu" and such, and it has the location's address and contact information.
One big problem: the "links" are not clickable, and, in fact, the whole page is just one big image.
1) where are those links?
2) what about my aging eyes and my ability to copy/paste that shit?
3) lolno.
Behold the current source code:
<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Transitional//EN" "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-transitional.dtd"> <html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"> <head> <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=ISO-8859-1" /> <title>Jewel Box Cafe: This is what art tastes like.</title> <style type="text/css"> <!-- body { background-color: #290000; } --> </style></head> <body> <div align="center"><img src="images_jewelbox/jewelboxhomepage.jpg" width="701" height="743" /> </div> </body> </html>
[Update: I called the cafe and all is good: http://azurelunatic.livejournal.com/6445043.html ]
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Smooth.
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Comment: This comment says that our code is totally standards-compliant if you look at this standard.
SEE? TOTALLY STANDARDS COMPLIANT IF YOU PRETEND IT'S STILL 1999!!!
[header portion starts]
YO THIS IS A WEBPAGE.
SHIT MAN WE GOT A TITLE. THIS IS SICK.
OH HAY CHECK IT OUT CSS
LOOK, I'M'A MAKE THE BACKGROUND ALL DEEP RED AND SHIT, THIS CSS SHIT IS WHERE IT'S AT
[header portion ends]
[body portion starts]
CENTER THIS SHIT, YO. CENTER THE FUCK OUT OF IT. MY CSS, LET ME SHOW YOU IT.
O hay an image.
OK YOU CAN STOP CENTERING THAT SHIT NOW.
[body portion ends]
O HAY THAT WAS MY WEBSITE. HOPE YOU LIKED IT, WASN'T ALL THAT CSS SO AWESOME AND SLICK?!?! YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE HOW SLICK AND AWESOME THAT FUCKING SHIT IS!!!
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Except, you know, not.
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Need I say more?
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http://scuttlebird.com/webpricing.php
How much? Sure, for a legit set of sites that'd be reasonable value, but I'm guessing they went for the $350 option there...
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I like to believe that they thought the links must be clickable because, you know, it's the internet. That's how it works! You click on words and it takes you to other pages!
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