Azure Jane Lunatic (Azz) 🌺 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
azurelunatic) wrote2011-11-02 02:35 am
azurelunatic) wrote2011-11-02 02:35 am
Entry tags:
This thing, it is creepy and assault-flavored
Sometime last year, someone (who sounded young, incoherent, and male) serial-added me on LJ.
Normally I just brush off that sort of thing: at the time, I was reasonably prominent there, and well-connected, so it stood to reason that I was going to get a little more than my fair share of weirdlings. Even so, this one stood out.
It was an assault-flavored kind of weird: he had this story, or "story", written in weirdly-capitalized very clumsy language, about a woman shopping, a store employee creeping after her and forcing a kiss on her (and then telling her that it was just a kiss and nothing to get upset about); when she returned the next day to complain about the employee's conduct, the manager claimed that there was no such employee. The portrayed reaction of "OMG HOW THRILLING" on her part when she heard that was just the cherry on top, as was how he was saying that OMG THIS STORY IS MADE UP ... OR IS IT? PARTS ARE TRUE. I ADDED SOME TWISTS BUT HE REALLY WORKS THERE. Also, he tagged it as funny.
Artistic free expression means that he can write stories like this all day long. It also means that I am free to say that the story is crappy, the writing is crappy, the twist is crappy, the whole thing is creepy as hell, and no matter what kind of narratives he prefers in the privacy of his own head, I sure hope he knows that kissing people without their consent is not "only a kiss", it's assault, creepy, and people don't find this thrilling or funny, they find it gross. I cannot think of a single explanation of this thought process that would put this guy on the "yeah, I'd be at least minimally ok with one of my fish or anyone else in my general area of influence dating him" list. Maybe "yeah, that was 10 years ago and I was going through a really stupid phase; I'm very sorry I ever thought that was in any way appropriate". Maaaybe.
Normally I just brush off that sort of thing: at the time, I was reasonably prominent there, and well-connected, so it stood to reason that I was going to get a little more than my fair share of weirdlings. Even so, this one stood out.
It was an assault-flavored kind of weird: he had this story, or "story", written in weirdly-capitalized very clumsy language, about a woman shopping, a store employee creeping after her and forcing a kiss on her (and then telling her that it was just a kiss and nothing to get upset about); when she returned the next day to complain about the employee's conduct, the manager claimed that there was no such employee. The portrayed reaction of "OMG HOW THRILLING" on her part when she heard that was just the cherry on top, as was how he was saying that OMG THIS STORY IS MADE UP ... OR IS IT? PARTS ARE TRUE. I ADDED SOME TWISTS BUT HE REALLY WORKS THERE. Also, he tagged it as funny.
Artistic free expression means that he can write stories like this all day long. It also means that I am free to say that the story is crappy, the writing is crappy, the twist is crappy, the whole thing is creepy as hell, and no matter what kind of narratives he prefers in the privacy of his own head, I sure hope he knows that kissing people without their consent is not "only a kiss", it's assault, creepy, and people don't find this thrilling or funny, they find it gross. I cannot think of a single explanation of this thought process that would put this guy on the "yeah, I'd be at least minimally ok with one of my fish or anyone else in my general area of influence dating him" list. Maybe "yeah, that was 10 years ago and I was going through a really stupid phase; I'm very sorry I ever thought that was in any way appropriate". Maaaybe.
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That is...disconcerting.
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ETA: One other thought: It might not be a bad idea, if you know of a cop whom you can trust, to tell the cop what you've said here and give the cop a copy of the weirdly written story. That kind of capitalization is idiosyncratic; it's like a fingerprint. If he's doing the odd stalking thing with you, he may well be doing it with someone else, or have several people at different stages of being stalked. I'm saying this from experience. Guys who get their thrills this way often aren't restricting themselves to one target.
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