Bristol 8, 9

[azurelunatic]

So the Bristol Stool Chart covers numbers 1 through 7.

Briefly, the Bristol categorization goes from Bristol 1 (hard pieces), through Bristol 4 (perfectly smooth but generally cohesive), through Bristol 6 (fluffy discrete soft pieces), and Bristol 7 (completely liquid). To say nothing of combinations. (The combination of 1 with 7, at high speed? Cannot recommend.)

So that covers two stages of matter: solid, and liquid. Completionism demands more.

Bristol 8 would be primarily gas. If you are aware that it is gas and that you do not need to run to the bathroom, it probably isn't a Bristol 8, but if you had to run to the bathroom and it turned out to be either only or primarily gas, that's a Bristol 8. (Here I sit, all broken-hearted...)

(In the other direction, the Untrustworthy Fart one, we like to say here "I see Mister Bad Username has visited!" There was a guy, let's call him Sam Hartworthy, who fell afoul of the organization's first initial + last name username policy. Unlike Eustace Clarence Scrubb, he deserved it completely, by word and deed. If he ever petitioned to get it changed, history does not recall, but he certainly was using that email address until his well-about-time-ly firing. And he was fired.)

Bristol 9 is always a combination with another number, as it is Fire.

Comments

[jecook]

... took me a second there. ::cackles::

[azurelunatic]

This was the guy who wanted the doggy physical therapist to immerse herself in the pool in which a previous dog had shat, because of course his dear dog needed her appointment and no excuse would suffice.

Also he was incompetent at work, generally unpleasant, and I have learned was fired not because he didn't meet his Performance Improvement Plan, but because he was gaslighting another employee that the other person was on the verge of getting fired.

[jecook]

... What an absolute cockwomble.

[azurelunatic]

Like I said, we had no guilt about making fun of his username behind his back.

[azurelunatic]

A friend advised me that Bristol 8 is mostly mucus, typically from a bad drug situation, and therefore gas and fire should be 9 and 10.

[azurelunatic]

Therefore, a combo with 10 as fire could simply be, Bristol 11-19

[vass]

I guess the usual cause of fire would be adolescent boredom and/or peer pressure?

Or a kink practice I've never heard of, I suppose. (I have heard of fireplay, to be clear. Just not internal fireplay.)

[azurelunatic]

My friend Purple rates excessive meal spiciness with a number: how many hours of pain does it cause. I feel that this is the main cause of fire.

Though bile acid reuptake problems can result in another kind.

[vass]

My friend Purple rates excessive meal spiciness with a number: how many hours of pain does it cause.

Ah yes, Cousin Enya's take on 'holding the fire'.

[azurelunatic]

"We had an excessive amount of Bristol 10 in the barracks, folks..." -- the commander of Camp Permafrost, probably