Sex & intelligence

[azurelunatic]

How integrated are your sexuality and your intelligence? Are they mutually exclusive, or do they work together? Can you get them to work separately?

Comments

[wiredferret.livejournal.com]

Mine are pretty separate. I can use intellect to analyze sex, but only when not engaged in being turned on. I like that release of relaxing into the body-thought. But I can only do it with people I trust, so that's an issue.

If I don't trust them completely, then I run things on parallel tracks, but get different gratification out of sex -- being clever and good instead of uninhibited. I get the most compliments from that kind of sex, and I like it, and the power.

The first few times I have sex with anyone, I'm usually smart, and protect my inner self with wit and skill. If I decide to trust them, I let go more and more. This can have drawbacks, as it makes it hard for me to discuss sex issues with long-time partners, since I let my analysis go on vacation for the evening.

I do have situations that will snap me out of any sexual fugue up to a point where I can be self-interested again. The hint of unprotected penetration. Feeling threatened. Need from my partner.

[iroshi.livejournal.com]

Ummm...I dunno? Clarify the question and perhaps I can answer.

[azurelunatic]

It's now in one of today's entries.

[stakebait.livejournal.com]

Er, she said articulately? They're not the same thing, but they're both fundamental to the me-ness of me -- probably the first two things I'd say if asked to describe myself, in fact -- so in that sense they're integrated.

I'm not sure what you mean by work together and separately.

Have I been stupid because of the depths of my wanting? Sure. Often, even. So in that sense they are mutually exclusive. But that's the stupid that means imprudent, which isn't so much a loss or deliberate shunting aside of intellect as it is putting my thumb on the cost/benefit scales.

I'm attracted by intelligence, certainly, and turned off by the lack of it even in the conspicuously pretty. So in that sense they work together.

Is the sex that I have smart? Sometimes. Certainly the power of words and imagination here adds a dimension and a variety to it.

And sometimes very much the opposite, intentionally so. Submission, which is a big part of sex for me, is the cure for overthinking and intellectualization, forcing me back into hyper awareness of the immediacy of the moment and my body. If I didn't do the one so much, maybe I wouldn't need the other so much. But I love both, and I want both, so I don't think of them as opposed so much as complementary.

Have I come anywhere near answering the question?

Mer

[azurelunatic]

Well, since it was such a broad topic for discussion, yeah.

[stronae.livejournal.com]

Hah. shadesong said I should read you, and along comes this post. Interesting.

Anyway, yeah, I guess I was hoping for a clearer question. I can't say anything really new currently.

[azurelunatic]

Clarified.