Attention...

[azurelunatic]

No, Darkside, thank you for pointing that out, but no, I do not need to wash my cleavage. That is not dirt, but a permanent skin discoloration thanks to an infection I had in high school...

(Before, I'd commented on the ill-advisedness of punching him in the stomach for something silly or other, because that likely would have caused him to barf on me. He commented that yeah, if he were in any shape to be aiming, that he'd have to barf down my cleavage, and then commented that I need to wash it...)

So, again. Why is he looking at my cleavage?

Skippy says I have very nice boobs.

Comments

[wiredferret.livejournal.com]

Why on earth do you let him get away with saying negative things about your appearance?

[azurelunatic]

Technically, I think it was meant in the same spirit as a comment of "your fly's unzipped" would have been.

...I'm making excuses again, aren't I.

[wiredferret.livejournal.com]

Mmm... yes.

I'm very careful about saying anything like that, even to my nearest and dearest. Our accidental phrases can cut deeper than anything.

[azurelunatic]

From him, I'm wounded by comments about my weight, or about promniscuity. The rest I count as Darkside things; he really has very few social graces, much like Enrique Borgos. We stand so close that one ill-advised move puts someone's finger up someone else's nose...

[wiredferret.livejournal.com]

But he will not learn social graces if he doesn't get told what's hurtful. Sure, it may be a hurtful specific to you, but social graces are mostly empathy-checking before you open your mouth.

[azurelunatic]

He's learning, actually, both by being told and by picking up how I react to what he says after he's said it. I gave him the eyebrow-raise and explained the exact situation; he'll think first before saying anything of the like again.

I sympathize with him in this case, actually. Neither he nor I had particularly social childhoods, he less than I. The things that he should have learned about playing well with others in elementary school he's only picking up on now.

He doesn't have this problem with most people, primarily because he knows when to keep his mouth shut with most people, and overcorrects by saying very close to nothing that isn't about neutral subjects such as gaming and movies. I find it encouraging for his developing social graces that he is sticking his foot in his mouth. He rarely makes the same mistake twice if corrected...

I put this in opposition to Shrimpy, a former schoolmate, who had and has few social graces, without bothering to disguise them under Darkside's layer of quiet reserve that keeps him from sticking foot in mouth with most people. You could tell and tell Shrimpy that this behavior was not suitable, and it would go in one ear and out the other. Shrimpy was like that with everybody, and he never seemed to learn...