The rename plague

[azurelunatic]

I found the form to start the legal rename process.

The part that's giving me trouble is the last name.

My name is Azure Jane Lunatic.

"Lunatic" is not the sort of last name that is great for a job application or a driver's license.

All the other last names I try on have felt wrong. The worst ones are the ones that are closest to right. They look almost right but when I try them on and imagine my manager using it, or with an honorific, it's suddenly like wearing a high collared raincoat a size too small at 80°F with 80% humidity, and I can't breathe anymore.

Lunatic.

I don't want to do this twice.

Comments

[jesse_the_k]

I changed mine, and even once is a challenge.

In another language?
Finnish = hullu
Yiddish = lunatish
Slovenian = blazneaha
Punjabi = Pāgala
Polish = wariat

You could add a syllable to the ones lacking.that anapestic Magic.

[azurelunatic]

Kuikka is possibly better, if I were going for Finnish. Or Lómr.

[ursula]

How do you feel about simple Azure Jane?

[azurelunatic]

It's ... incorrect, but not Wrong.

[jadelennox]

if you don't want suggestions, please forgive me, and skip over the rest of this comment (or delete it -- I won't be offended)...

[protection space in case suggestions will make you unhappy]






Would you be willing to spell "lunatic" oddly? Like "Lunatique" or "L'un Atoque" Or something very strange? You would still get hassle when you had to spell your name to people, but it would just be hassle about a name they didn't understand, and it probably wouldn't hurt you on a job interview. But you could pronounce it just the same.

[azurelunatic]

I don't think I would do well with that. Alas.

[wibbble]

I have no good suggestions, but offer *hugs* and good luck at finding a suitable compromise.

(And also :o( that a compromise is required.)

[azurelunatic]

Thank you. I figure that being Weird in a world that does not reward that particularly is always going to involve a lot of compromise.

[tim]

What about some variation on "moon" instead, for subtlety? Or just "Lune" or something like it.

[azurelunatic]

"Luna" and various other derivatives are still in the running. "Moon" and "Fish" are both out of the running, not because they're bad, but because I'm a mid-30s SF/filk convention-goer who is not actually related to Elizabeth Moon or Leslie Fish that I know of.

[andrewducker]

"Moon"? Or "Mooney"?

(I know someone with Mooney as a surname.)

[azurelunatic]

Sadly I don't like the sound of "Mooney" for myself, and "Moon" is disqualified because the sf/filk convention circles are still very small, and it has incorrect implications about my relationship to certain authors in same.

But other moon-based derivatives are potentially possible.

[vass]

I have no suggestions, I'm just wishing you luck to find exactly the right legal name (whether that is Azure Jane Lunatic or something else.) Having been through this last year: it is a huge hassle, but doable, and it is SO WORTH IT when people call you by the right name and you have it on your official documentation and it's you. Like you said: it's about comfort and breathing easier.

[delight]

This. I just want to second this. My birth name felt so not-me over my entire life, and while no one used it often (just derivative nicknames or calling me Rue depending on who they were) my parents refused to legally change it, and ... I was 21 when I finally got it done because of finances and other dumb requirements. And I have now gone from wanting to throw up whenever my name is used officially to feeling like people are actually calling me.

My best friend is trans and likened my reaction to my birth name to his experiences with gender dysphoria, only it was name dysphoria, instead. It wasn't something I would ever have thought to say because I am not trans and wouldn't want to appropriate experiences and can't claim to understand but ... I guess a lot of people who have The Wrong Name may have a downplayed but similar reaction, like being given the wrong pronouns. It's not as extreme and it's certainly not the same, but the way I did nothing except immediately become ill when someone tried to make that name me -- I'm clearly not alone in it and it's an enormously icky experience. One I hope stops for you soon.

I wish you all the luck in the world in finding the right combination of letters that is genuinely you.

[azurelunatic]

Thank you. I'm glad you have it now.

[siliconshaman]

Sympathy...
Might I suggest L'Atic. It sounds the same and looks innocuous.

I wish you luck anyway, I know what it's like being stuck with a name that doesn't fit you... and personally if I had any idea what would suit me, I'd change mine.

[azurelunatic]

Thank you.

[amadi]

As another in the "my name is not my name but it is my name" boat I sympathize totally, and I hope you find a solution.

[azurelunatic]

Thank you, and good luck to you as well.

[krait]

Hope you can figure it out one way or another!

Lunat? (Because if you're a Lunat, noun, then you're lunat-ic, adjective!)

[azurelunatic]

*snickers*

Thank you.

[krait]

*grins* You're welcome! I wish you the best of luck as you ponder the many mysteries of names (and grammar). :D

[siderea]

I hope you can find something else that works for you. May I suggest "Whimsy"?

Out of curiosity, is "Jane" a middle name, or the second element to a two-part first name?

[azurelunatic]

Unfortunately, "Whimsy" has the disadvantage of looking like an unexpected, non-name word, without the advantage of actually being my name.

"Jane" was originally a middle name, but it's very possibly in the process of migration.

[kk1raven]

I hope you can figure out something that works well for you.