Azure Jane Lunatic (Azz) 🌺 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
azurelunatic) wrote2022-04-29 08:02 pm
azurelunatic) wrote2022-04-29 08:02 pm
Entry tags:
"We have food at home"
Sausage McMuffins are good. I like them.
[The meme is an equilateral triangle.
- Top: "We have food at home."
- Left: *pulls into the drive through as the children cheer*
*Orders a single black coffee and leaves*
- Right: "MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS!"
Arrange your blorboes upon it as you see fit.
https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/1328607-mcdonalds-alignment-chart ]
This week we have had the three main ingredients available simultaneously. I've been poking at the method to get the best results and can report back.
I use:
* Store brand sourdough English muffins, generally split by hand as I'm usually too mentally somewhere to fetch a fork. (Alternate: sourdough bread, toasted)
* The big bags of sausage patties that are sometimes but not always available at Costco
* American cheese slices, 1 per patty (alternate: cheddar, we usually have shreds, or a melting cheese of your choice)
* savory-compatible grease (butter is our go-to, but we've also been known to use whatever we've rendered recently and/or bacon grease)
* lingonberry jam (IKEA) (extremely optional; in Alaska you can use lowbush cranberry jam since that's literally the same plant )
Equipment:
frying pan
toaster
fork
flipper (isn't it weird that "spatula" means both flipper and scraper styles? Also it makes the phrase "house flipper" potentially hilarious)
plate
spreader
timer
napkin or paper towel to wrap so as to catch the grease and/or any falling objects
Note: this is optimized for cooking the patties from frozen, and would have to be adjusted for non-frozen; they are also fully cooked so it would need further adjustment for cooking sausage from raw. I've never worked with veggie sausage but I imagine one would start with the package instructions and make educated guesses from there.
This is also adapted for ADHD, because instructions like "until browned on one side" are Deeply Unuseful for a situation where that can vary. I have taken to setting timers, usually in increments of 5, 9, or 10 minutes (depending on the heat I'm using and what's going on). I also keep a close ear on the stove. Official stove use advice is to also never leave items unattended, I figured I'd toss that out there because otherwise Quinn the Quarantine Fox would be disappointed in me.
My previous adventures in this were in the microwave and were somewhat steamed and limp.
Start the pan, ideally with a little grease; on our stove this is 4 or 5 (Medium)
retrieve 2 frozen sausage patties from the freezer, flop them stiffly into the pan
set the timer for 5 minutes to let them thaw enough to effectively have a flat surface on the pan & make sure they can be separated
*meep meep meep*
Flip!
At this point if you're doing the bread-adjacent object in the pan, put it in the frying pan. Make sure there is enough but not too much grease.
Set timer for 5 minutes. This will brown one side.
Retrieve cheese, one slice per patty, or equivalent. Place it conveniently.
Do some dishes, or whatever.
*meep meep meep*
Flip your sausage patties.
If they are in the pan, flip your flat carbohydrates.
Place one slice of American cheese on the top of your sausage patties.
Set the timer for another 5 minutes.
If you are not doing the muffins in the pan, now is the time to start your toasters.
Maybe do some more dishes.
*pop*
*sizzle*
*meep meep meep*
Collect your toasted carbohydrates onto the plate. Retrieve your sausage patties and stack them sandwich style.
Optionally, spread the lingonberry jam on your item. I just tried that today and while I put it on top of the stack so it would be easy to wipe off if I didn't like it, it could certainly go on the non-cheese side of the inside.
Potential pitfalls:
- burning any part of the operation
- not having access to ingredients that meet your personal dietary needs
- getting cheese directly on the pan (this will go greasy and possibly burn)
- toaster going on fire
- forgetting to set a timer
- having a frozen patty in a really weird shape
- having a frozen patty stuck to others and they won't pry loose
- putting two slices of cheese on the thing as it comes out of the pan and thinking "oh, the residual heat will melt it" -- it was Much Too Many Unmelted American Cheese and was Not Good
[The meme is an equilateral triangle.
- Top: "We have food at home."
- Left: *pulls into the drive through as the children cheer*
*Orders a single black coffee and leaves*
- Right: "MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS!"
Arrange your blorboes upon it as you see fit.
https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/1328607-mcdonalds-alignment-chart ]
This week we have had the three main ingredients available simultaneously. I've been poking at the method to get the best results and can report back.
I use:
* Store brand sourdough English muffins, generally split by hand as I'm usually too mentally somewhere to fetch a fork. (Alternate: sourdough bread, toasted)
* The big bags of sausage patties that are sometimes but not always available at Costco
* American cheese slices, 1 per patty (alternate: cheddar, we usually have shreds, or a melting cheese of your choice)
* savory-compatible grease (butter is our go-to, but we've also been known to use whatever we've rendered recently and/or bacon grease)
* lingonberry jam (IKEA) (extremely optional; in Alaska you can use lowbush cranberry jam since that's literally the same plant )
Equipment:
frying pan
toaster
fork
flipper (isn't it weird that "spatula" means both flipper and scraper styles? Also it makes the phrase "house flipper" potentially hilarious)
plate
spreader
timer
napkin or paper towel to wrap so as to catch the grease and/or any falling objects
Note: this is optimized for cooking the patties from frozen, and would have to be adjusted for non-frozen; they are also fully cooked so it would need further adjustment for cooking sausage from raw. I've never worked with veggie sausage but I imagine one would start with the package instructions and make educated guesses from there.
This is also adapted for ADHD, because instructions like "until browned on one side" are Deeply Unuseful for a situation where that can vary. I have taken to setting timers, usually in increments of 5, 9, or 10 minutes (depending on the heat I'm using and what's going on). I also keep a close ear on the stove. Official stove use advice is to also never leave items unattended, I figured I'd toss that out there because otherwise Quinn the Quarantine Fox would be disappointed in me.
My previous adventures in this were in the microwave and were somewhat steamed and limp.
Start the pan, ideally with a little grease; on our stove this is 4 or 5 (Medium)
retrieve 2 frozen sausage patties from the freezer, flop them stiffly into the pan
set the timer for 5 minutes to let them thaw enough to effectively have a flat surface on the pan & make sure they can be separated
*meep meep meep*
Flip!
At this point if you're doing the bread-adjacent object in the pan, put it in the frying pan. Make sure there is enough but not too much grease.
Set timer for 5 minutes. This will brown one side.
Retrieve cheese, one slice per patty, or equivalent. Place it conveniently.
Do some dishes, or whatever.
*meep meep meep*
Flip your sausage patties.
If they are in the pan, flip your flat carbohydrates.
Place one slice of American cheese on the top of your sausage patties.
Set the timer for another 5 minutes.
If you are not doing the muffins in the pan, now is the time to start your toasters.
Maybe do some more dishes.
*pop*
*sizzle*
*meep meep meep*
Collect your toasted carbohydrates onto the plate. Retrieve your sausage patties and stack them sandwich style.
Optionally, spread the lingonberry jam on your item. I just tried that today and while I put it on top of the stack so it would be easy to wipe off if I didn't like it, it could certainly go on the non-cheese side of the inside.
Potential pitfalls:
- burning any part of the operation
- not having access to ingredients that meet your personal dietary needs
- getting cheese directly on the pan (this will go greasy and possibly burn)
- toaster going on fire
- forgetting to set a timer
- having a frozen patty in a really weird shape
- having a frozen patty stuck to others and they won't pry loose
- putting two slices of cheese on the thing as it comes out of the pan and thinking "oh, the residual heat will melt it" -- it was Much Too Many Unmelted American Cheese and was Not Good
no subject
(I'll have to try the pan fry method for the sausage tomorrow; while the microwave method does work when one is in a hurry and doesn't want to deal with Drive-thru shenanigans, I'll second the comment about it being kinda limp and updoot to INFINITY about not leaving stoves unattended...)