possible parenting descrepancy solution

[azurelunatic]

Co-parent (male) reports that LF is often self-centered when he should be thinking of others.

Bad way to deal with this: "You don't really want that" and guilt-tripping by making him feel bad about what he wants.

Possible better way to deal with it:

"That's what you want for you. What do you want for Mommy?" Acknowledges his wants, and that he has a right to want for himself, but also reminds him to think about the other person.

Comments

[wibbble]

Based on how I'd parent, I think you might be right about male vs. female parenting.

Of course, I'd say 'don't do that, or I'm going to put you in the oven. CLANG! goes the oven door...' and then laugh maniacally.

Of course, I wouldn't really put the kid in the oven. My oven's not that big.

[azurelunatic]

Used to be, I'd be more corrective than Marx.

I think the optimal correction strategy is short, immediate corrections -- "See? You just interrupted. Try to avoid that." -- rather than five-minute lectures on what a bad kd you just were.

[wibbble]

Exactly!

I'd put them in the oven /right away/.

[azurelunatic]

And only for a few minutes, versus for an hour.

[wibbble]

You're quite right.

I should use the /microwave/ oven!

[hookncrook.livejournal.com]

hehehe. Yes, it is so hard to fit them in those conventional ovens!