Love (copied from a comment to a friend, then expanded on)

Hell if I know much coherent about love myself... and I've been on a frantic husband-hunt since I was 5 or 6. Swear to gods. Been in and out of love as long as there have been other people approximately my age around me for me to fall in love with....

...Some people never get love quite right. My friend Sabrina's mom, she's on what, her third? fourth? marriage, and she's picked a guy that has stood her up at the altar twice for this latest wedding. Some people never learn.

Thing is, for some bits about love... loving somebody as a friend is just great. Just know where your limits stand. What are and aren't you willing to put up with?

I'm still trying to sort things out for me. Right now, with me and Adam, we've got a workable relationship because we are learning how to not step on each other's toes, not cross each other's limits. We seem to have compatible boundaries... but we're not falling over each other with Romance and True Love and This Will Last Forever I Know We Can Do It. We're just taking it one day, one week, one month, at a time. I still have to nag him to help with the laundry...

All that shit about love you see in the movies -- if it doesn't work for you, kiss it goodbye. Never wanted a Hollywood relationship myself. Can't stand the things. Too much goosh, not enough real caring about each other.

I've just now realized what it is that votania means about your One True Love relationship -- it is the relationship you make it to be. If there's a lifebond already there, excellent. Those are so beautiful when they're working. (When they're not working, however, there's blood and plasma-fire and explosions and other incarnations of evil.) But you've got to make it work.

If BJ and I had wanted to make it work, we could have. I think it ultimately would have ended up with us living in separate houses, and maintaining a place where we could go to sleep together every now and then, but not often. Go out for coffee at Denny's occasionally.

Every year around the 14th I get maudlin and mushy.

...but you know?

I think Adam and I might work out as a couple ... or as a triad, if we find another person...or as whatever .... for quite some time, if we can keep getting along this well. We're focusing on staying friends, and staying roommates, and the love (not totally overblown romantic, but nice and friendly) and relationship and sex pretty much take care of themselves.

I think I like it.

(no subject)

Darkside may be staying here at DeVry until March 2003. I am planned to graduate October 2003.

Cool.

Adam's job

Basically, because he's not too great about following rules-for-the-sake-of-rules, he's looking for a new job, effective at the end of the semester.

I wish him all good luck and speed!

Novel

All 412 pages of my novel safely printed out. Now I can do some paper editing. Should be fun. Am realizing exactly how crappy my 16-17 year old writing is, and even some of the 18-19 year old stuff. The novel's changed entirely; I may get rid of the vast majority of the teen humor and go for a lot of coherent social coding with little gems of moments tucked in ... that I think I can do.

Expect, btw, a lot of babble concerning my novel to be outpouring. Rather vague, as well; I'm hesitant to discuss something this close to me. May not even show the entire thing to Darkside as yet.

Read/shared excerpts with a lot of people, but offhand, only people I can think of who have been allowed to read the entire thing: Josh, Mommie Alice, Kimmiebeth, Lady E., my other ex-girlfriend, and Shawn.

Shawn scared me into the plot, though... I shall always have to thank him for that. Lauren got to read quite a bit of it; so did Bryan...

...These days, I want to have it good before I let Darkside at it. He deserves no less.

Balance

Could I show Adam my novel? now there's the question.

Indeed.

And why not Darkside?

"Playing Bonk"

Adam and I had a "working lunch" ... which means he came home for lunch, we hopped in the sack, and we worked it. votania and her little angel were home; Votania had the day off; she and Nephew were watching cartoons.

Apparently there were noises. Votania told Nephew that Adam and I were "playing bonk", because at one point, I know some furniture fell over...

( You probably don't want to know. )

for my novel

the trick door -- the door handle locks, knob does not turn. Latch on door is tricky, sticky -- will not seat properly unless given an almighty shove from the inside, tug from the outside. Otherwise, a tug from inside or shove from outside will open door.

Script as gratuitous humiliating/amusing/embarrassing moment for Rose initially; a saving of ass at a later moment.

(no subject)

What do you do in a houseful of empaths?



Hit yourself over the head with a hammer.

Awful Realization

The Pretender, Vordarian, tried to disrupt the Regent's happy marriage by letting the Regent's wife know that the Regent at least had been in the past bisexual. He had a moment of Awful Realization when he finally remembered, too late, that the Regent's wife wasn't from a sexually stodgy little backwater.

The Regent's wife, in her turn, had a moment of the same sort, after she realized that Vordarian had just been trying to fuck with her husband's marriage.

I just had one of those moments of my own.

If I don't have the little pink vibrating thing that plugs into the cigarette lighter with me here in Arizona, then it must be...

...back in Alaska, in the glove box of my car, the car that my dear (and somewhat aging) father almost exclusively drives.

Either that, or it's in my bedroom back in Alaska...

...which my dear and conservative mother has been attempting to clean.

Neither of them would be so crass as to mention running across the item to me in conversation, of course. It's not the Thing That's Done in this family... it'll just remain a juicy little item in the family Not-Talked-About store of gossip that never gets gossiped. And Mama, or FatherSir, will look at me sideways a little...

Eh, what the hell. It's funny.