![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
...so my Overlady doesn't have to.
(Unlike Skippy, most of these were not in fact direct orders, merely an exercise in observation and extrapolation.)
Previously: Things Azz Wasn't Allowed to Do as a Domain-Atrix
Things Azz Is Not Allowed To Do As Virtual Minion (Part 1):
Part 2
(Unlike Skippy, most of these were not in fact direct orders, merely an exercise in observation and extrapolation.)
Previously: Things Azz Wasn't Allowed to Do as a Domain-Atrix
Things Azz Is Not Allowed To Do As Virtual Minion (Part 1):
- Not allowed to discuss anything covered under the NDA with anyone who's not covered under the same NDA. (So while there may be future hilarious shenanigans that intrinsically involve NDA-covered stuff, only my actual co-workers are allowed to hear them. However, most of my job involves administrative support so far.)
- Not allowed to hit users with hammers to get product feedback. We use post-its instead.
- Absolutely must not lose the keys to the all-important team supply cabinets.
- Not allowed to be bored. (Rather than giving me busy-work, if there's nothing to do, I go home. They will be gradually ramping up the things they pile upon me.)
- May not carry out inexplicable/nonsensical orders without checking to make sure they make good sense in context first. (Specifically, orders from the overmanager who has a history of great ideas that don't always make sense in context.)
- Should likely not compare my position to that of Ivan Vorpatril in A Civil Campaign -- yes, it is entirely a situation with one private and a whole bunch of generals, but none of them are actually as scary as a High Vor matron, let alone a whole platoon of them.
- May not order from the list of Restricted Items without a manager's approval.
- Arguing with the notoriously cantankerous printer/scanner/fax is permitted, but unlikely to be fruitful, as it is more stubborn than I am, and has amazingly shitty UI.
- If the printer is actually broken, only people whose job it is to fix it are allowed to try, and those people are not me.
- There are probably hundreds of potential uses for about 500 stickers with an outdated and/or misprinted version of a company logo and/or slogan on them. Are *any* of those uses likely to be permitted?
- While "folding attack spider" is certainly an evocative description, it's not a very helpful item to list in the team supply cabinet inventory.
- Not allowed to lose the boxes to the other folding easels, lest they also lurk in the drawer as a folding attack spider.
- Finally allowed to dispose of the large box overflowing with huge scrolls of paper bedaubed with post-its from ancient meetings.
- Not allowed to directly recycle anything with potentially sensitive writing on it, as all that must be shredded.
- It's not very neighborly to jam other departments' shred-bins full of All The Paper.
- The prohibition about sharps in the shred-bins holds true here too. (I had to explain why the sight of a shred-bin was making me snicker, while getting an orientation tour.)
- There is no horn pile in this workplace, and therefore napping in it is not even possible, let alone permitted.
- Absolutely not allowed to do anything to upset, alienate, or discompose the very nice cleaning lady who provides the extra-big bag for the directly-recyclable parts of the paper pile.
- Going along with the Overlady and Manager's cunning plans for cocktails? Permitted. However, the rooster part, perhaps not so much.
- One cannot actually order roosters through Office Depot; if one could, they'd certainly be on the Restricted Items list.
- (The Overlady, meanwhile, has realized that she should be careful what she wishes for lest it be granted.)
- "Hive" is merely a semi-arbitrary designation assigned to a room that it may henceforth be identified more quickly. The Hive does not require bees, wasps, or those vespine aliens from those books about the telepaths.
Part 2
