- Mon, 23:47: I ALREADY LICKED A LAPTOP FOR YOU WHY DO YOU WANT ME TO LICK AN IPAD
 - Tue, 00:03: My fitbit #Fitstats_en_US for 5/18/2015: 12,134 steps and 5.2 miles traveled. http://t.co/gFMrr7HEB6
 - Tue, 00:35: dear condescending shit co-worker: if you try one more time to explain the benefits of a fitbit I may share this: http://t.co/R5uJ5HqCZ1
 
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