Up vs. Down

Hair. I used to have it in the utilitarian cut my mother designed: bangs, and just short enough all around that I wouldn't be able to pull a strand into my mouth to chew on.

At about 11, 12, I began to experiment with the style. First I tried letting it grow longer. Got to a little past shoulder length. Then, a short cut, maybe three inches long and wavy. It grew out from there all through the rest of junior high and into high school. Started cutting my own hair senior year: gave myself bangs again, long ones that puffed up in a way that River said was so very anime. Cut the top of my hair short enough to spike that summer; wound up with a freaky-cool mullet in the end. That grew out for a year under my bakery hat, then I shaved the front half of my head. George dared me, you see. BJ was pissed at that; he'd liked my hair long. All the better. To wound him in a fight, I chopped off most of the back of my hair, leaving one punk tail.

Moved to Arizona. Punk tail left; the remainder of my hair, all one inch of it, got bleached (again) and dyed blue (again; the mullet had turned first orange and then blue as well), which, on schedule, faded to green, then bronze, then got dyed black. Again.

Now? I've been letting my hair grow out, and the longest strands are past my shoulders; the short bits in front drip below my chin. It was last dyed black in January. The brown roots trail a good three inches, or more.

I have been wearing my hair up, back, contained. Not a flattering style for me. My hair should be down, framing my face. Up was more convenient with the phone job, more convenient with the bakery job, where it was under a hat at any rate. As soon as it was long enough to tie back, I confined it. Easier to deal with tangles from the night, easier to keep out of my face when working.

I've been starting to wear my hair down. It looks nicer that way, even when I can feel a billion tangles. It used to be straight in the absolute; as my father predicted, when adolescence hit me with the big stick, it became wavy, curly almost. I said once before in one of my paper journals that sometimes hair was said to cascade down like water; mine, if ever described that way, would have to be phrased in such a way to embody the violence of a waterfall, the crashing strength, crushing tangles. My hair wraps around the necks of men it doesn't like, strangling them should they try to kiss me. When it gets longer, it'll be dangerous.

Some men equate hair length with personal strength. Mine seems to go with beauty...

impotence

( Probably seriously TMI )

Userpic: Spock

This is the picture I use to indicate, primarily, two things: Friendship that knows no boundaries, or, an impenetrable barrier.

This is the image of Spock and Kirk, from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, where Spock is dying of radiation poisoning, saying his farewells to Kirk. They will eventually be reunited; not even death can kill their friendship. One alien, one human, so close that words aren't always needed anymore, each one incomplete without the other. Perhaps they're not equals on every subject, but they treat each other so, deferring to the other's greater expertise when appropriate, taking the lead when they're the one to do so. An equal friendship. Love.

There's a wall between them. A clear one, but a wall nonetheless. It's there for a good reason, to keep the radiation in, but it also keeps Kirk out, from being by the side of his friend, from touching his hand one last time. It keeps Spock from transferring his katra to Kirk. No contact. Insurmountable barriers.

It's also a card of deep grief, yet with the promise of renewal. This is the death of a soulmate. This is self-sacrifice for a greater good. This is the bitterness in every triumph. This is the triumph in every seeming defeat. This is the promise that this, too, shall pass! This is the affirmation that life does go on, that things once thought dead shall spring alive anew, in different form.

This is a userpic that I use often.

Bwa-ha-ha.

X-Files fic, from the LJ mood challenge. http://www.jaegecko.com/mood/thatthingshedoesinthecaronlongdrives.html

Sharing the joy.

Calling Dell

How fun.

More Dell

Nope, I'm not purchasing memory. I have a very good copy of it here next to me, though it is getting a little beat up. Hm, maybe I

Jerad

would be the dude's name. Much more polite this time. He's looking up information. On hold.

Dell Order

Complete. Yay. Thank the gods.

But owwww! on the price. It was the battery. I can't go wandering around with the bloody batteries inoperational, can I?

linguogenesis

... and then there's *con*persion, which is the happiness that you feel when your beloveds are enjoying themselves in organized meetings, usually of a fandom...