Hey, Marx, check here for help... they found the chicken sword...

http://www.forumplanet.com/planetdrakan/topic.asp?fid=4523&tid=719215

(no subject)

Reading fic again: Hermione/Draco does some strange, strange things to me. I see myself in Hermione, of course, and Darkside in Draco. Don't we all? UST, forbidden love, exhaustion, dehydration, and LJ deprivation. I'm depraved on account of I'm deprived?

I love DArkside. I really do. I think he's a bumbling obsessive prat, and I love him. He can't hide things from me very well now. Nor can I hide things from him. The other day I started a landslide of true confession, and we're not holding very much back at all, when it comes to truth.

I'll just not touch him, is all. I'll only dream of kisses, get hugs elsewhere, push his hand away if it gets close to me. If he wants to be only friends, and wishes me to think of him as only friends, then by damn I'll put him on the correct side of the "oh gods I want to fuck you but we're only friends" barrier, which I've been melting down of late.

He loves my roommate. She's moved on, changed image: sweet and tough, not tough and evil.

I don't give a fuck if he's my soulmate. He's just my best friend.

(no subject)

when going to sleep, being woken up suddenly panics me, especially by phonering. If calling and I'm asleep, even if you know me, especially if you know me, say hello, this is..., and wait a few seconds for me to wake up before going into urgent business. Thank you Shawn.

General note:

I become irrational for all practical purposes when at that nod-off-to-sleep-at-any-second stage of tired, especially when kept awake by this and that and things that perhaps I should have just said "I need my sleep NOW" over.

I become irrational when having a panic attack, especially when the panic attack invokes the shade of a past crisis that nearly got my best friend killed.

Put need-sleep and panic attack together? Bad, bad combination. I'm surprised I was as coherent as I was; maybe I stayed awake those minutes to make sure I was awake enough before falling back to sleep so I wouldn't have nightmares. (I did dream about the movie theatre universe: I had a family, there, and there was conversation about the variety of urban scavenger who recycles aluminum.)

• There's a fine line between putting up with some general baggage for a friendship (tact), and not being upfront.


• In the future, I'm going to try to be more upfront; Darkside and I sound like we might be finally getting that way with each other. Despite the hysterical crying fits.


• Yes, I have personality issues. No, I have no idea if they're going away or what any time soon. I do know that they get worse when I'm tired.

How to Make the Goddess Brew

Take 8-12oz milk. Heat to boiling. Add 1/2 cup instant coffee, and slightly more instant hot chocolate mix. Add 1/2 cup sugar. Taste. Continue to add sugar until the resultant mess no longer tastes like the Christians' mythical Satan's underpants.

Enjoy.

Verrrry interesting.

When your friend makes a sassy comment and you grab his throat reflexively, this is just fine... until you realize that the friend whose throat you are grabbing is not the friend whose throat you grab.