Ooo oooh oooh! PotC fans!

Just look what hinoai made!

Prr.

I feel all warm and loved now. Just thinking about Darkside... heh. An hour on the phone with him, shy and girltalking at him, will do that.

Curiousity killed the Lunatic...

What's up with somebodies? It doesn't look to be another "esoteric poetry" thing...

Fwd: What *not* to say to your Dominant

dancing_star; I find it hysterical too.

What NOT to say to your Dominant

• Pushing limits does not mean making Master so angry the vein above his right eye throbs.


• "Quit it!" "Ow, damnit!" "I'm hiding that toy when you go to work tomorrow" and cursing a blue streak are not safe words.


• "Oh my god, where did you get those, they are gorgeous!!!" is not considered boot worship.


• "Ya want fries with that?", "Want me to drink it for you too?" are not appropriate remarks when Master gives you an elaborate drink order.


• Flipping your dominant off while your hands are cuffed behind your back is a bad idea. Owners have ways of knowing these things.


• Putting lube, goop, Superglue, ink or any other substance that will sully the hands of Master on his toys while setting up for a session is not a good idea.


• Kicking that toy you hate far under the bed is futile. Master will only secure your wristcuffs to your anklecuffs and make you crawl for it... repeatedly.


• "Bite me" is never an intelligent response to a command.


• Doing your Beavis and Butthead imitation of "Fire, fire, fire, fire!" during Master's lecture on fireplay safety is considered rude.


• Responding with "Yes, All Wise, All Knowing Grand Imperial Weenie" is not appropriate when Master asks you if you are comfortable during a bondage scene.


• Asking to go to the bathroom every five minutes while Master practices his Japanese rope work on you will try his patience, quickly.


• Crossing your eyes and sticking your tongue out while your dominant is discussing your punishment is not wise.


• There is no such thing as slave immunity, free slave day, or the pms defense. The slave jury might not convict you, but the Dom judge will override the verdict. Count on it.


• Pretending Master's collection of buttplugs are toys and singing the "Weebles wobble but they won't fall down" song is not a good idea.


• Repeatedly blowing out each candle Master lights during wax play will get you punished.


• Checking Master's head for the 666 symbol after a harsh punishment will only get you more of the same, or worse.


• "I know you are but what am I?" is not the appropriate response when called a raunchy little whore during humiliation play.


• Using the spreader bars, paddles or canes for the fireplace is not a good plan.


• "Missed me, missed me, now ya gotta kiss me" is an unacceptable remark when Master's flogger slips.


• When Master pulls out his bullwhip and says he wants to play, he doesn't mean hide-and-seek...he will find you eventually.


• Calling Merry Maids when you are ordered to spruce the place up is not what your dominant had in mind.


• "Faster, faster, we need a new Master" is NOT the song to sing during a session.


• "Oh, and you think I am?" is an unacceptable response to hearing your dominant say he is not pleased.


• During a play party is not the time to do your hilarious imitation of Igor and hunch over, moaning "Yes, Master" when ordered to fetch something.


• Adding "Sir" or "Master" to "Fuck that plan!" will not save you.


• Singing the chorus of "Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better" under your breath during a session is considered foolhardy.


• Arguing whether "Master might not be right, but Master is never wrong" is Zen or Buddhist philosophy will only get you rewarded with kneeling in the corner on a bed of Legos "to help you consider the question in quiet contemplation."


• Reciting nursery rhymes during an interrogation scene to crack your Owner up only lasts for so long. Then you will pay BIG.


• Asking "Is that as HARD as you can hit??" is considered a cry for help amongst submissive suicide prevention workers.

Though I think that some of them would be very appropriate for me, given the Sub I seem to have, and also given the only person I'd be comfortable having dominate me.

Unrelated:

DeVry Phoenix's internet access is down. There was an open pit with their phone lines exposed in it for last night's monsoon. Any questions?

Sandstrom thinks they may be up by sometime today.

The labs were a ghost town. There were a few people working on real school work.

Whee!

The introduction of olliesmama and wiseheron has gone well.

boojum has some capitalization ranting, wherein a common construction of mine is shown as a good example.

shadesong linked to me.

Which adds up to some happybounce, which is good.

So...

What kind of toys does my Sub like?

Today: School, sleep, bras, books.

Went to class after waking up late. Began to sketch out the rules for LARPing network interactions (as a teaching tool). Has someone been spending too much time around gamers?

Came home. Planned to go to Catherine's for bras early, but somehow missed that. Was almost ready to head out at three-ish, but my body took one good look at my intentions and told me firmly that either I was getting a nap, or it was collapsing. I opted for a nap.

Turns out that Catherine's doesn't have E cups, but they did have 48 and 50 DDD. I tried on both, and went with the 50. It felt like gun turrets or something, the Madonna effect. Not that I'm compaining. This current POS is doing the spaghetti-strap thing, which is *%#$@ painful.

The nice lady pointed out that tomorrow is their 'buy one, get one 50% off' sale on underwear, and offered to put my bras on hold for tomorrow. (Good customer service, yay! Plus it helps that I was being my sweet, pretty, and charming self. I'm starting to see the pretty in the mirrors.) I happily accepted, but given that I was getting three (all they had in that brand and that size and that style) I bought one today, and will come back for the other two tomorrow.

Hit the mall after that. Was planning to cruise through and return Circus of the Damned at the library, but the library looked very closed across the parking lot, so I turned around and went back in the mall and got Stealing the Elf-King's Roses (Duane) from Waldenbooks with my $5 reward coupon and assorted change. Happy Loony!

I debated a movie, but decided that home would be the best option. Though I do want to see American Wedding sometime... possibly with someone who will appreciate it, rather than Darkside. (He's too cultured for stuff like that. Or he has standards. Or something.)

I got to ride one of the cool long buses, and sat in the turny-part.

Stealing the Elf-King's Roses is good so far. I don't think that any of outofambit's books can escape a certain amount of ... shall we say ... esoterica. It rings through true and clear to me, even in her SF.

Got home, and the Viking was here to check his e-mail. Sadly, Tigereye had crashed in my absence, something that left her fans whirring, but monitors dead and power button single-press nonresponsive. So I held down the button and she did shut down. She's back up now just fine. And I did too clear Blaster off her and put on the patch; so there!

Did dishes, as the dishwasher had been unloaded (thanks, marxdarx!) and then started reading Cerulean Sins (Laurell K. Hamilton). Why, yes, this means I'm reading two books at a time. But hell, that one's a library book.

Awww.

Stuff like this just makes me all giggly.