Answers you Won't See on the Support Boards:

Dear LJ User,
Rich Text Editor is FCKEd. Use plaintext instead.
<3,
Support

Dear LJ User,
This thing that you are complaining about? We know it is broken. You are the 1338th person to tell us.
<3,
Support

Dear LJ User,
The thing you want to do to your style is frightful and ugly and just made impossible by our new, stricter standards on how much you can mangle the style code. ...Go try MySpace.
<3,
Support

Dear LJ User,
This feature that you request will never be implemented. This is because it is stupid and would be easily abused.
<3,
Support


Dear LJ User,
We can't figure out wtf you're trying to ask us. Pretend like we can't read your mind, just for fun. Use your grown-up words and comment back & tell us wtf you actually mean, vs. what you thought you meant.
<3,
Support

Dear LJ User,
Your keys are right where you left them, on the table under that stack of mail.
<3,
Support

Dear LJ User,
RTFM.
Support.

Not jam; not subservient

Also: "Not Jam"

http://community.livejournal.com/metaquotes/5100211.html makes me think of http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Evil_reptilian_kitten-eater_from_another_planet, which deserves some hot Uncyclopedia action.

Goreans in the UK -- nice that the fellow is mediagenic enough to say "some women have a desire to serve" rather than making the sort of blanket statement about the gender that gets non-subservient women (and men who know that non-subservient women exist) rather annoyed.

http://cadhla.livejournal.com/1062607.html

(no subject)

So Miss hangup got busted for not reading verbatim. That kind of job performance does not say "I need my hours" to me.

(no subject)

The aspiring cartoonist got caught trying to smoke in the bathroom. Stressy college chick played bad guy this time.