My hobby:

Artisanal, small-batch, handcrafted horrifying fiction

Seasonal feast!

Enumeration of dishes:
* Spiral-cut ham, from the depths of the freezer
-- took much longer than anticipated to cook because it was not fully thawed, did not begin to get particularly warm until we cranked the temperature in the oven to ostensibly 300 (recommended: 275)
* Stuffing from a box, side dish
-- classic, quick to make, no notes except Alex took a Hot to the foot when condensed steam dripped from the lid and that was Unpleasant
* Mashed potatoes
-- I think we made exactly the right amount for the amount of feast, 2 cups of flakes for 8 standardized servings, putting the seasonings in the boiling water before adding flakes. The butter could have been warmer (it was just off frozen and I hauled out the big chopping knife to cut it)
* Sausage stuffing a la Our Friend Big Bad Daddy K
-- I think we got it exactly right this time; I boiled the mirepoix extremely hard until it was not only tender but the liquid was nearly evaporated, so it took much less time to crisp the top. I used the slap chop and the finger slicer on the vegetables. I cannot cut an intact half-onion with the slap chop and should not have tried.
* Grocery store brownie with the shiny cronch balls
-- the shiny cronch balls are pearlescent coated crisp rice or something similar, not classic dragees
* Grocery store mini pecan tartlets
-- not the mini pies, but the just over 1" ones, very cute (and the only pecan pie adjacent thing left in the store)
* two cans of biscuit
-- I scorched my hand on one of the trays and that was Unpleasant. Next time definitely spray grease the pans and maybe save baking the second can until the first can is nearly gone?
* Ham "gravy"
-- failure: too much cornstarch and too much dripping. It was a concentrated salt gel.
* Cornbread
-- The part that didn't go in the stuffing
* there were leaves for leaf bucket in the fridge
-- there certainly were
* lingonberry "fruit spread"
-- IKEA, perfect, no notes
* "pomegranate" 7up
-- it's certainly red? Not unpleasant but it maybe walked past a real pomegranate and got scared by it as a child?

As this was the old oven's last hoorah, we'll have new quirks to work out for next time we try for a feast.
- we definitely should have used the roaster, although that would have involved some Rearranging
- it also would have needed Some Cleaning
- Belovedest gets the Gold Star for cleaning stovetop and sinks and putting away the dishes; that let us drop cooking-dishes directly into the dish washer and I believe the dishes are quietly drying now
- About half the meat is in a box marked SLAM (SLiced hAM) and the other is in a bag with my intention of split pea soup
- there are two boxes made up with a full Leftovers Meal tray
- there are two smallish mint-green-lid boxes with Box Stuffing
- there is a large box the size of the SLAM box with the Sausage Stuffing
- all except one of these boxes is in the bottom drawer
- the bone bag is also in the bottom drawer
- I claimed the last of that jar of lingonberry for a drink, but I may not be able to finish the rest of it tonight
- unsure where the TJ's lemoncello bottle is; I know where the empty one is but that wasn't the question
- unless it's behind the microwave, it seems like a thing that could hide behind the microwave
- anyway the drink is sparkling water with lingonberry jam and a splash of triple sec and maybe I'll go wild and dissolve a cinnamon Atomic Fireball candy in it?
- Belovedest clearly needed a little more sustenance throughout the cooking process
- one of the wheels has started falling out of my desk chair and I have ordered a FUCKING METAL new base for it
- in the meantime, I have Belovedest's desk chair, and they're not scheduled for WFH until like Tuesday, and the object is supposed to arrive by Sunday

Called Mama in the midst of prep