OK, I caved.

Everyone, please welcome kittenhate.

Dreams

I think I may have quieted down in my sleep. I hope I'm not spamming shywickedpixie too much...

Interesting bits from a conversation with sithjawa while she was in the lounge:

[02:46] sithjawa: What's up?
[02:47] azurelunatic: I am "killing kittens".
[02:47] sithjawa: As we speak?
[02:47] azurelunatic: Just so.
[02:47] sithjawa: Hee.
[02:47] sithjawa: Eris would be so ashamed of you.


[02:50] azurelunatic: Darkside must be smoking crack to think that ralmathon and I would argue over a girl.
[02:54] sithjawa: The Beast sounds like a dildo, not a person.


[02:58] sithjawa: Snakes striking are, like, *designed* to be scary.

And she's in my *head*!

This morning, when I was walking to school, I wanted a cigarette.

The fuck?

I don't smoke.
I have never smoked.
No one I live with smokes.
No one I hang around with often smokes.
I start coughing every time I have to walk through an area where people are smoking.
(Okay, so I could survive without coughing when I walk through smoke, but it's commentary.)


I finally figured out what it was. It's rosalynde. Even though her only existence on this particular plane is in my novel and in her LJ, which I write for her, her presence is strong enough to influence me. And the absence of Zach from her life is hurting her so much she's taken up smoking. She knows it's bad, she knows it's slow suicide... and she's smoking.

She'll quit when she gets pregnant.

She would be in therapy, not smoking, if she could admit to herself what it was. She's the one her triad grounds to, and they're not stable as a triad. Well, they would be... but Rose needs someone to keep her grounded, or to learn how to ground herself properly. As it stands now, she's not well-grounded enough.

When Zach died, Rose turned to Scotty for the stable friendship she needed. Zach died in 1996. Rose and Scotty were friends (his family did move back to Fairbanks in the early spring of 1997) and balanced each other: Scott with his unresolved lack-of-love-life, and Rose with her seemingly perfect triad. She needed someone not in the triad to vent to, though, and Scotty was the perfect wailing wall. Just little things. Dave is oblivious to stuff, and Regan can get a little hysterical, and Rose needs someone to talk to who won't turn it into a nasty feedback loop.

Then Rose and Scotty fought. I think she cussed him out because he'd just violated the underlying premise of the closeness of their friendship: he was an outsider, so it was safe for her to vent to him. Once he and Dave slept together, though... she cussed him out for sleeping with HER fiance, and banished him to the ends of the earth. (Oddly enough, Regan stayed in contact with him somewhat after that, little emails randomly back and forth, as she decided that he, through virtue of sleeping with Dave, was Part of the Relationship, albeit an estranged and one-time one.)

Then Rose had Beth, and that was good, and not quite as secure. But when Rose moved, that connection got disrupted, and then the worrying medical reports made her not put much stress on Beth... and she never did make any new friends in Arizona. She did take up smoking, though.

Hmm.

Bethel Lutheran Church (7 registered participants)
7310 N. 27th Ave. (Just North of Glendale Ave.)
Phoenix, AZ
We will gather at the church to receive candles and for prayers at 7 pm, and then march from the church north and south along 27th Ave., between Northern & Glendale, with our lighted candles. We will gather back at church for closing prayer.
Sunday, March 16, 07:00 PM

Ahh, the sound of priorities

Got my homework for Web class done and turned in on time. Yay!
Got my mail to Pamela at CPG out: nine emails processed. (Ow, but getting better...)
Texted minakochan for possible getting-together.

No kittens yet this afternoon/evening.

Wow, I can breathe.

The sounds of someone preparing a glass of salt water, then deliberately partially inhaling it, are amusing.

tiel pointed me in the direction of this interesting technique for dealing with allergies, and I must say, it's interesting. The proper technique has a bit more in the way of implements (you pour the saline up one nostril and let it pour out the other, with your head at such an angle so it doesn't get into the back of your throat, and gravity gets to take care of it pouring out the other nostril) but sticking your nose in a glass of salt water and inhaling carefully and gently seems to do a great deal of interesting things, most of them relating to you then letting salt water sputter into the sink when you pull your nose out of the glass.

Arizona is both bad and good for my sinuses. Good: I do not often have them totally clogged by evil goo. Bad: the evil goo that would otherwise have been clogging them has been dehydrated, and clings to the inside.

Thus, water up my nose. This may actually turn the trick of making my nose both clear of yuck, and have the inside moisturized.

Eeeep?

Bald Guy was in an accident. He's out of the coma now, but still in critical condition. Eeep. Good thoughts.