Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails (83161 words) by Lanning
Chapters: 13/?
Fandom: Smallville
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Relationships: Clark Kent/Lex Luthor
Characters: Clark Kent, Lex Luthor, Martha Kent, Jonathan Kent, Lionel Luthor, Pamela Jenkins, Whitney Fordman, Eddie Cole, Stephen Hamilton, Mercy Graves, Eli Cohen, OMC, OFC, Pete Ross, Chloe Sullivan
Additional Tags: WIP, Identical Series
Series: Part 11 of Identical Series
Summary:

Part Eleven of the Identical Series. What are little boys made of? Clark and Lex confront their pasts, and fight for their future.

I have seen two posts about this so far, so this is for anyone who was reading it and didn't bother to subscribe because there had been no recent updates. (Chapter 11 was 2010, 12 was 2013, 13 was apparently Very Recent.)

Title: Not!fic: Aral You-Had-One-Mission Vor^H^H^HKosigan Naismith, A Battle of Escobar AU
Fandom: Vorkosigan AU
Author: azurelunatic
Size: ~7 kb
Advisories: Not!Fic. Barrayarans! and their fucking honor. :( The party continues in the comments.
Note: klreeher was out for dinner with zarhooie and the name "Aral You-Had-One-Job Vorkosigan" popped into my head.
Summary: Not!fic of what happens when Aral fails to get Prince Serg killed.


So Cordelia and company get picked up in their little thingy just like canon, and are brought on board, et cetera.

Aral notably fails to get Serg riled up enough to go to the front. Aral knows his responsibility here: bring the ship into the line of fire, and get blown the fuck up.

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shirozora recently posted about how default heterosexuality (particularly in the Disney property Tron) unnerved her in a fashion she couldn't examine too closely, and I put my finger square on the problem. From my comment:

I don't like the feeling that in some universes, I would not exist because I am bisexual, because in those universes, everyone is heterosexual unless they are the Designated Gay. In some universes, it is not canonically okay for some characters to be quietly and discreetly gay, or quietly bisexual, or quietly asexual, and g-d forbid anyone actually be TRANSGENDERED. And that is not okay with me. I would not want to live in such a universe, but it overjoys the fuck out of me to go around queering up these universes so WE CAN EXIST.

Some default-heterosexual universes don't have anyone who is Designated Gay. I wouldn't exist there. My sister wouldn't exist there. Most of you guys wouldn't exist there. My best friend might exist there, but he'd have never met me, because I wouldn't exist. Dreamwidth wouldn't exist. Large parts of LiveJournal wouldn't exist.

Having a wildly disproportionately small number of Designated Gays sometimes feels worse. It's harder to pretend that anybody who might be one of us is just quietly closeted and not coming out to be stared at and bullied and beaten and killed. There are a few of us, and they might represent some of us, but they don't represent all of us, and maybe we don't even like them. Albus and Gellert don't even get main-text, they get subtext and an offhand post-series interview mention. (And I don't like either of them.) Pretty much everyone else gets an opposite-sex relationship plastered on.

I exist. Some universes are better. Jamie Crawford exists, and so do Kurt and Blaine and Santana and Brittany, and Aral and ... and Ethan and his whole damn planet. Jamie goes around being loudly fucking fabulous and daring people to make something of it.

Silence = Death. If fictional people are silenced by their authors, then fuck yeah, we're marching right the fuck in and giving them voices.

So somehow I have turned some of the regulars in The Demon's Lexicon chat into fans of Growing Up Cullen. The following is not-particularly-sane product of this intersection.

Things you need to know going in:
Nick is a very disturbed young man who is also kind of a badass. He is a womanizer, a troublemaker, and hangs out with the bad boys when he goes to a school and needs a social crowd.
Edward is a ~*beautiful*~ ~*vampire*~. Also a bit of a priss.
The Chat has an obsession with chocolate, fever fruit, and general hilarity. Chatter goes on for a while before the crossover starts. I have spell-checked this a bit, but not much more than that.

( Knives and chocolate and Alan )
Azz: I thought I was being so clever when I noticed that Nick was dyslexic before it was mentioned.
Azz: Then I felt very silly when the reason became apparent.
Eva: Well if you hadn't noticed, perhaps you would have felt sillier.
Azz: But demons have no need to pass spelling tests!
Eva: They do if they have to go to regular schools.
Eva: Or want to please their family member.
Azz: I KILLED THIS SPELLING TEST FOR YOU, ALAN
Azz: IT WHIMPERED IN SUBMISSION AND THEN DIED
Azz: SEE HOW IT IS BLEEDING, ALL OVER?
Eva: Alan would understand.
Azz: Yes. He would ruffle Nick's hair and find cookies.
Azz: BUT ARE YOU NOT PROUD OF MY EFFORTS, ALAN?
Azz: (it is a sad and scary thing that Nick is occasionally crossing in my head with Growing Up Cullen)
Eva: If he smiled while looking for the cookies then Nick would have probably thought the mission was a success
Azz: Yes.
Azz: (I would not want to see what would happen if Nick and Edward Cullen were ever in a class together.)
Eva: Don't lie, you would want to see.
Azz: (well, yes)
Azz: (I just wouldn't want to be present)
Azz: (entrails would probably be strewn about)
Azz: (perhaps not either of theirs)
Eva: So long as they are not ours either, as we are not present.
Azz: Exactly.
Eva: But we are informed.
Azz: Edward would be ~*brooding darkly*~
( And here we go! )

I was zonked at three.

... now I'm going through the entire works of a certain 'phile LJ friend on Gossamer, trying to remember which of them I'd read earlier, and if I'd totally fangirled over any of it, because that would be a very, very small world indeed.

I know I remember some of the titles.

Had a Shayara fanfic dream the other night. A Cyteen crossover. Odd.

Shagging. Slash.

Characters: Draco Malfoy, of Hogwarts. Maul the Sith Apprentice, of Star Wars.
Situation: Sidious is entering alliance or at least mutual-help-when-convenient discussions with Voldemort. While the bosses are busy, Draco Malfoy has been told off to entertain the Sith Apprentice.
Ownership: Lucas owns Maul. Rowling owns Draco. Both of them would be appalled.
Author: azurelunatic, with mad props to othercat and Dawn for being there (at different times) to release the bunnies.

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Telegrams can only be nine words, not including stops, or you have to pay an extra fee. So you've got nine words to tell a complete story. Define who's writing to whom before beginning (these words don't count against your nine). STOP indicates the end of a thought or a sentence. FULLSTOP indicates the end of the telegram. If that wasn't clear. This challenge will be open until Monday morning at 10 am.

My original comment in the entry with the challenge


Author: azurelunatic
Fandom: Harry Potter
Rating: R or higher for implied *ahem*
Summary: Two unrelated exchanges of telegrams.
Pairings: Harry/Ron, Narcissa/Sirius (incest)
Author's Notes: Also some political commentary on the fandom_scruples issue.

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