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azurelunatic: stick figure about to hit potato w/ flaming tennis racket, near jug of gasoline & sack of potatoes (bad idea)
[livejournal.com profile] gameboyguy13 came home from Vegas (yay AF! I'm glad it went so well for you guys this year!) and since airplanes and trains on the same day are cranky-making, and also since [livejournal.com profile] ursamajor and [livejournal.com profile] hyounpark were in town, it was as good as any for an excuse to meet up and have fun. (More on that later.)

Since I am a heretic who doesn't believe in breakfast food, and I also have the disconcerting habit of eating nearly the same thing almost every day for weeks on end, it was necessary to get things such as cereal and milk for the JD. (I also don't suffer lactose well.) I also picked up a half-dozen spicy Italian sausages, on the grounds that hey, I do like sausage. (JD was not a taker as there had been many too many hot dogs in his recent past, plus, he was still suffering from the effects of overindulgence in spirits on the previous day.) (On the way out of the Trader Joe's parking lot, I identified my aunt's SUV by its license plate, and waved like crazy. This doesn't happen often.)

Upon getting up in the morning and deciding it might be time for breakfast, yeah, I decided to start the sausages, and dumped them in the frying pan and turned it on. (It was turned on high.) I promptly forgot to turn it to low, but assumed that I had, because I'd meant to, and skittered for the bathroom to See To Female Needs and put on some clothings.

The Female Needs were rather more ... dire ... than I'd thought, and required cleaning products as well as feminine products. I started to smell something that might be the sausages, and scurried through the rest of the cleanup and threw my nightgown back on rather than bother dressing and raced back to the kitchen.

Happly, there were no flames. However, the sausages in the frying pan had begun to billow alarming amounts of smoke. JD was still happily immersed in his computer, and hadn't noticed a thing. As I rather hurriedly told JD to open the door, not that one, the glass one, the smoke alarm went off.

I stood there in my faded and ink-spotted pink nightgown, working the front door like a bellows to clear the worst of the sausage smoke from the apartment, the smoke alarm still blaring, JD jumping at the smoke detector, fanning at it, wearing his glasses and a pair of boxers. Someone, I believe my upstairs neighbor, popped around and asked whether everything was all right.

It was, I assured him, and "just a sausage incident."

JD, in plain view of the door, turned colors.

Once the smoke cleared, I finished cooking the sausages. They were tasty, aside from the burned bits.
azurelunatic: <user name="azurelunatic"> grins while her best friend ducks.  (grin & duck)
For the usual reasons, the best friend and I were discussing him being a cantankerous bastard (which he is) on Friday evening. He had intended to say that he was going to get "the Grinch song", to continue the discussion. Unfortunately, he lisped.

It is very likely that there will be either an actual pair of red-with-white-fur-trimming butt floss in his future, or at least a lot of jokes about this particular item.

I didn't even hear it. I knew what he'd meant to say, but then he started backpedaling. I was confused. He asked me what I'd heard. He explained what he said. I proceeded to tease him. It's so very nice that he allows me these opportunities.
azurelunatic: Cordless phone showing a heart.  (phone)
Tried walking at work, following a 45 minute meeting
with Management about spreadsheets. I'm sore and tired
and clumsy. Wandered into admin office, where the
Princess, Snarky Lady, her highness the queen of the
office, and the Web Geek were. Fumbled walking roll; bumped into
table. "Had too much of Grandpa's cough syrup before
work?" the Web Geek asked.

"I didn't get enough sleep, because I got Cox this
morning!" I said, levitating slightly on the word
"Cox".

"..." said everyone.

"... We went from DSL to cable this morning, so I had
to clean up. Cox is the new ISP," I clarified.

The tale is making its way around the office.
I'm notorious.

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azurelunatic: Vivid pink Alaskan wild rose. (Default)
Azure Jane Lunatic (Azz) 🌺

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