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azurelunatic: LiveJournal pirate ship.  (pirate)

Poll #6666666

Open to: All, results viewable to: All

So how's about some Sponsored Communities, in addition to the Plus accounts, huh? (Oh, and, um, paidusersmightkindaseeads.)

View Answers

Run away screaming
1024 (80.0%)

Politely decline
256 (20.0%)

Cautiously try some
2 (0.0%)

Enthusiastically try some
1 (0.0%)

(Propz to Berv for these excellent poll answers, which I swiped from her. Definition of cheese may not be sanity or stomach-safe. )



Somewhat later...

[livejournal.com profile] bradfitz: "Holy hell, sorry about that. Communication is not our strong point this weekend. Lemme get the red pen and re-do that post. Previous stuff still applies: you paid, you no see ads. OMG. Sales and I are going to be having a nice long talk, as much as I hate taking time away from the geeking. SMS is totally for the win, though, and we're willing to let free users use it if you recognize that THERE WILL BE ADS on that part of the site, just like your buddy with the Plus account, the one you don't comment to anymore. Sponsored comms are going to happen, but they'll be well-labeled. And I totally want to use the word "clusterfuck" to describe this situation, but I can't put that in this post and get away with it, so forgive the typo, 'k? Now. I'm'a leave for the weekend and address the rest of this on Monday."

Slashdot Refugees: "You know you love us."
Snarky Users: "Um, no."

Relieved Users: "OMFG THANK YOU BRAD WE LOVE YOU MARRY ME THINK OF ME FONDLY! (Please promise me you'll try...) "
Relieved User: "Well, now what do we do with the angry mob we assembled?"
Relieved Users: "Party time!"

Annoyed Users: "But we'll still see those comms on the front page when we log in. We don't have the choice to avoid them."
Support Volunteers: "Um, you do know you can log in using the Navbar and never see the front page, right?"
Annoyed Users: "Brad, reality check. You're no longer paying attention to LJ. LISTEN TO US. We are saying NO here."
Annoyed Users Who Swore They Were Leaving Last Time: "LJ, YOU ARE LYING LIARS WHO LIE!!"

Luddite Neophobic Users: "STOP giving us new features. Or at least make them opt-in only."
Observant Users: "If they were opt-in only, no one would use them, if these comments are any indication. Maybe LJ wants us to at least try the shinies before declining them."
Neophobic Users: "No. Enough with the bells. Enough with the whistles."
Opinionated Users: "Navbar hate thread forms over here! Tips on how to get rid of it when it's forced on! Come one come all!"
Detail-Oriented Users: "The Console is fun."

Feedback-Oriented Users: "There are still a few issues with how sponsored comms come up in searches, though."
Cynical Users: "And here comes the damage control. How come Brad only comes out for the damage control?"
[livejournal.com profile] bradfitz: "Dude, I sold this thing so I could concentrate on the geeking, and not have to go play with users all the time. I come out and raise hell if things start going wrong, but otherwise, I'm in there with my headphones on so I can't hear y'all screeching."
Brad's Fanclub: "Where's 6A's respect for Brad? OMG CORPORATE CORNHOLINGS ALL AROUND. It's not your fault we're in this handbasket."
Other Cynical Users: "This munged-up announcement and then retraction was a ploy to get us to accept it. Notice how this isn't in [livejournal.com profile] news?"
Concerned Users: "So exactly how much is LJ going to bow to these sponsors? Will LJ start jerking the users around at the whim of the sponsors? How much of our data gets shared? Do they get to spam us? Give us some reassurance here. Please."
Concerned Anti-Establishment and Explicit Slash Writing Users: "Please tell me they get dumped if they try and commentspam us. If Warner Brothers sponsors comms, they had better not take my disestablishmentarianism icons and my graphic NC-1701 22+ chan slash noncon away from me!"
Anti-Fanfic/RP Users: "...wait, this could make fanfic and RP go away? I ♥ this."
Constructive Critic Users: "How about an extra section on profile pages, for sponsored comm memberships, that gets hidden from Paid users? Or you could switch to a different financial structure."
Detail-Oriented Users: "'Mostly not evil people' work for LJ? Um."
Archive.org and Google Cached Page Fans: "LJ, YOU ARE LYING LIARS WHO LIE!! Um, that is to say, you say it ain't a slippery slope. I see you sliiiiiiiiding."
Constructive Critic Users: "And something you haven't thought of yet but I see 1000 other people have mentioned: there needs to be a separate little picture for the sponsored comms. This one: $!"
Users Who Have Read the Previous Post: "Um, they're planning on that already. Though maybe not with that picture."

[livejournal.com profile] slashdot: "Pwned."
LJ: "Dude, it causes a tiny blip on LJ's servers when /. hits us. We could totally /. your ass by linking you in [livejournal.com profile] news."

Support: "Brad! Your communication boo-boo, YOUR FAULT. Not Rah's. WE KEEL YOU."
[livejournal.com profile] bradfitz: "Sorry. My bad. ETA: Not Rah's Fault!! MAJOR BROKEN COMMUNICATIONS HERE AT LJ CENTRAL!!"
Observant Users: "... no fucking shit."
Reproachful Users: "'ETA: Sorry Rah' does not cut it. You have more problems than you realize."

Page 4 Commenter: "'Clusterfuns.'"
Non-US Users: "There is not enough voice post love for us."
Political Debaters: "Politics wank thread forms over here!"
Annoyed Users Who Swore They Were Leaving Last Time: "Still sucks. Still haven't left yet."
Righteously Annoyed Users: "Try more with the 'asking us first' or at least the 'telling us well in advance' rather than the 'sneaking stuff in and then announcing it', eh?"
Cynical Users: "Stop talking down to us. You suck."
Optimistic Users: "Thanks for not talking down to us. You rock."
Drama Fans: *pass around popcorn and brownies*
People Who Still Maintain an LJ For Some Unknown Reason: "So why don't the people who are bitching about it just, you know, leave? I did."
Disgruntled/Disenchanted Paid Users: "This is not the kind of service I paid for. Why should I keep a paid account if Plus accounts get all the cool stuff for free?"
Irate Trolls: *troll*
Haters: *hate on Rah*
Easily Amused Users: *get involved in fun comment threads*
Thoughtful Users: *realize that their lengthy, well-considered essay responses just ended up on page 42 because the quick-comment people got here first*
Random Commenters: *make no sense*

This summary has been brought to you by Henrik Nyh's adaptation of the LJ Thread Unfolder with "Unfold All" (a GreaseMonkey script for FireFox), and 12 cups of coffee.
azurelunatic: The LJ pencil,  (pencil)
http://www.livejournal.com/community/lj_maintenance/109755.html

So LJ moves. This changes not only their physical location but also their IP address. Suddenly, AOL and Yahoo and a whole bunch of other e-mail providers are all 'WTF, mate? They say they're LJ, but it's a different IP address! SPAMMER!' and then SpamCop gets in on the action. So they're all pointing fingers and yelling 'SPAMMER!' at LJ, and LJ's all 'No, seriously, it's us! IT'S US! WE JUST MOVED! ... *snif* ... nobody listens to us... '

Meanwhile, LJ's e-mail server is all 'Goddammit, that one fucking bounced again. *sigh* I'll send it later.' Six million messages later, half of them (the ones to AOL) have bounced, and the e-mail server is all 'SHIT! You mean I've got to send out all these current comments AND I've got to dig up all the ones that bounced? ... Fuck that. I'm getting more coffee and maybe some cyanide and a cigarette and anyone who doesn't like that can go fuck themselves talk to AOL. And SpamCop.'

So LJ geeks have figured out why the e-mail server started throwing a hissyfit, kicked themselves in the asses for not figuring it out sooner, retrieved the e-mail server from its extended smoke coffee break due to frantic overwork, nursed the wounds inflicted upon them by the seriously pissy e-mail server, taken the plunger to the clogs, and dispatched some of the heavily armed monkeys to help sort out the comments and will probably be peeling comments off the ceiling when the monkeys start throwing them. All comments should either be delivered in a timely fashion (if they're current), or delivered soon (if they're queued) as soon as the geeks get the heavily-armed monkeys to give them back.

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Azure Jane Lunatic (Azz) 🌺

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